asher fuckboy millstone (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
moneyballer) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
futurology2016-08-09 08:04 am
moneyballer) wrote in futurology2016-08-09 08:04 am
VIDEO; 001 | ID: I CAN B UR DADDY
[The video feed turns on to feature a well-groomed man in his mid twenties, who at this point attempts to present his meanest mug to the network. He seems to think that this is actually a good idea, despite everything that went down in the desert. As far as he’s concerned, he has reason to celebrate- Asher, a mere mortal with little to no survival skills, somehow managed to make it through the meteor shower and protect the little alien he’s been assigned to.]
‘Sup bodacious babes. Homie-g’s. Haters.
[He does a little nod to the camera, playing it as “”””cool”””” as he can.]
I was thinkin’, since we’re out saving the universe n’ all… We could use something cool as like an intro, a theme song, y’know?
Something funky fresh. Like a fresh ass beat!
[He clasps his hands together, spitting into them with great enthusiasm but a slight lack of coordination.]
Yo, yo, yo, A-Milly in the hizzzz-house!
Milly as in a million, always stuntin’ like a-
[Asher pauses here, looking a little confused. He blinks once or twice, as if he’s trying to remember something important.]
Vill-i-ain? Um, I’m still working on the intro. Anyway-
[Clearing his throat, he continues on. The interference is probably making this transmission even worse (if that’s possible, can it really get any more embarrassing than this?).]
We up in here, we in the zone
Ready to take care of all yo’ homes,
Don’t matter if it’s outer space, cause we gon put them bad guys in their pl-AAYYYYYCE-
[He ends enthusiastically, but freezes mid-air. It seems as though he’s considering saying something else, but his shoulders drop and he shrugs.]
Uh, yeah. That’s all I got? But I think it has potential. Anyway, um, if anybody wants to like… Help me finish or whatever.
Hit me up, mothafuckaaaaaa.
‘Sup bodacious babes. Homie-g’s. Haters.
[He does a little nod to the camera, playing it as “”””cool”””” as he can.]
I was thinkin’, since we’re out saving the universe n’ all… We could use something cool as like an intro, a theme song, y’know?
Something funky fresh. Like a fresh ass beat!
[He clasps his hands together, spitting into them with great enthusiasm but a slight lack of coordination.]
Yo, yo, yo, A-Milly in the hizzzz-house!
Milly as in a million, always stuntin’ like a-
[Asher pauses here, looking a little confused. He blinks once or twice, as if he’s trying to remember something important.]
Vill-i-ain? Um, I’m still working on the intro. Anyway-
[Clearing his throat, he continues on. The interference is probably making this transmission even worse (if that’s possible, can it really get any more embarrassing than this?).]
We up in here, we in the zone
Ready to take care of all yo’ homes,
Don’t matter if it’s outer space, cause we gon put them bad guys in their pl-AAYYYYYCE-
[He ends enthusiastically, but freezes mid-air. It seems as though he’s considering saying something else, but his shoulders drop and he shrugs.]
Uh, yeah. That’s all I got? But I think it has potential. Anyway, um, if anybody wants to like… Help me finish or whatever.
Hit me up, mothafuckaaaaaa.
no subject
wow ]
Then you should have your fun somewhere where no one else has to watch it. [ She huffs, pauses, and adds: ] Trust me, if I were being "a bitch", you wouldn't be able to even think a response! [ She'd fry you to bits. ]
IM SC REAMING
Gritting his teeth, Asher attempts to keep calm. She doesn't have to know.]
oh yeah??? like
like what, huh
[With a pitiful expression, he glances at the situation between his legs, then at his phone, and then at his hand.
Oh no.
Is this actually how things are going to go?]
dkghdkghdj oh m y god
Ah, I was mistaken, it seems you're already incapable of thinking of any intelligent response...
But if you're asking what I'd do-- [ She taps her cheek... and winks. ] A girl never reveals her secrets just like that!
THAT ICON
w hat
wut r u doing
if u r makin fun of me plz stop, ur cute ok???
dont do me like this
HER BOD IS UNREAL thanks oda
It takes her a moment to parse through the "u"s and "r"s but when she does--
she laughs. ]
Is that why you're writing to me instead of talking? Have you never seen a cute girl before?
Alright... I'll stop, but then you'll owe me!
no subject
wait
i dont hav any $$$$
if that is wut u r implying
[dolla dolla bills yo]
no subject
Ah... so you're poor. I thought the shirt showed some quality, but I guess I was mistaken!
[ thanks for wasting her time asher ]
no subject
ok xcuse u????
this tie is prADA
[Oops, he sent that far too quickly. How impulsive of him.]
no subject
One: your voice is annoying and your use of words is appalling. Two [ another finger ], you can't even spell correctly. And three [ and another ], one expensive tie doesn't make you rich-- if you have no money, you're poor. That's just a fact. You're just poor not only in money, but also in everything else.
no subject
im sry
im rly not used 2 being
"""poor"""
no subject
Of course... I should have guessed. You're one of those who has never had to go hungry, or steal something because you can't afford it, aren't you?
Maybe being poor will do you good!! If you never experience what it's like, to have nothing... you don't know how to appreciate it when you have it all!
no subject
But there is something else that can be said for a child surrounded by everything he could theoretically want, and still feeling empty, unloved.]
ummmmm no? stealing is against the law last time i checked lmao
no subject
Yes... you're right. But can you imagine a situation like this: a crew of pirates takes over your village. They come in, demand people to pay them for the right to live... kill those who don't have the money. No matter what anyone does, it won't help. The government won't send help, the Marines look the other way. There's no one you can go to. But they tell you... if you can pay them one million, they will let the village free. All the people you love. If there's no other way to get that one million, but to steal from pirates like them, those whose fortune has already been stolen? Would you do it?
Would the law mean more to you than the people you love?
no subject
Asher bites his lip uncomfortably, avoiding Nami's gaze even though he's still responding through text. Well, at least the murder mentions killed his boner.]
No, it wouldn't.
I hadn't thought about it like that.
no subject
[ Despite her harsh words from before, Asher is actually taking this seriously, and it gains him a small smile; appreciation, perhaps, that he's not stepping back to the weird rhymes or bad jokes but rather treating it with the kind of consideration it deserves. Nami knows her life hasn't been easy... but it hasn't been as hard as some of her crew mates', or those she knows. ]
The law isn't always there to protect us. Those in power aren't always good or trustworthy. If it is, where you come from... then that's a good thing! But not all worlds go by the same rules, so you can't judge them based on what you know, either.
[ She looks at him (or what she imagines would be him, there, like he was in the original video he made), direct and honest, the kind of gaze it's hard to look away from. ] I was ten years old when I had to make the decision, to work for the pirates that killed my mother. To work for them and steal in order to free my village. I lived eight years as a pirate and a thief, and I did it all to save my sister, everyone I loved. Do you think I deserve to be imprisoned for that?
[ She rarely speaks of her past directly like this, but somehow, this matters; it's important that he understands. If he hadn't thought of it like this, then it matters that she makes sure he will. ]
no subject
Just like it hadn't protected that man who his father let rot in prison, the man who was going to die for a crime he didn't even commit-]
No.
[His shoulders fall, and the silence on his end is imperative of something. He may not understand, fully, but what he does know is that perhaps he spoke too soon. Asher wasn't even all that bothered by the way Nami slighted him before, but a part of him wants to excuse her for any cruel things she may have said.
If life have been this difficult for her, could she really trust people that easily? Especially an imbecile, who might have been wasting her time.]
Not at all.
no subject
A beat- and she smiles. ]
Maybe... you're not quite that hopeless after all. [ And maybe the smile makes her look like a different person, open and bright, something that wasn't there at all before; she grew up with distrust, with manipulation and very little sympathy for others, because that was the way to survive. And yet... it never meant, nor does it mean now, that she wouldn't have a heart that believes in change, in people.
It's a smile that says, maybe you can learn, maybe you're ignorant not because you choose to be but because nobody's shown you different. ]
Just remember it, alright? Absolutes like "stealing is wrong" are rarely all of the truth, if any of it.
1/2
2/2
That's a lesson I've been learning lately.
[ugh he's gonna have 2 go rub one out isn't he fuck fuck fuck whY
gr8 nami
now he's gonna think about ur smile and those boobs]