VIDEO. UN: LOKI

[selfimage]

[ the sound of the wind storm hollows dully against the cave walls. Loki's squidge, Bacon, can half be seen crawling in the confines of his tacky green jacket and over his knee from where he sits, sometimes ducking and squeaking when a particularly large gust hits. to keep it from screaming, Loki offers his fingers absently, which the little squidge pulls on with its pudgy arms before ducking low again. ]

Hello there, it seems like we'll be waiting this out for some time considering the weather-type circumstances. While we're all rotting away, etcetera etcetera, I thought we could amuse ourselves with a game. A little bit of team bonding funtimes, so to say. [ he twists a dark nailed hand in the air, gesturing. ]

Soo—oo ... it's called Two Truths and a Lie. How do you play? Glad you asked, it's simple! Give two true statements about yourself and add a lie to the mix, shake it up then toss it out there and see if your team members know you well enough to spot the lie.

Usually this is done with copious amounts of alcohol, but we're lacking at the moment. [ pause. ] But—ah—you could always enjoy the satisfaction of being right. It's not like we're doing much else.

NOTE | Feel free to threadjack if that's your thing!! :****

Comments

[dbag]

I have risked my life so many times. [ Not willingly, but technically, it's not lying! Lying by omission. Not even really lying. ] Okay, as if any of your stuff is true. That's all so fake, I totally believe a half-man, half-horse brought you a spear, that sounds super realistic.

[heelies]

While the tale of Chiron bringing my father his spear is indeed not my own, this did happen as surely as the sun rose in the sky this morning. In the vasty wilds of Mount Pelion, which looks over my father's house, there live countless centaurs, savage in their ways and unkind toward men - all but for Chiron, who on that day spared Peleus from certain death, and who took me into his tutelage during the days of my boyhood. Why do you so blindly throw these accusations upon my words when you know not of what you speak?

[dbag]

Oh, my god, do you come with a Cliff's Notes version?

Anyway, you're wrong. I was lying about all of them!

[heelies]

So you admit your rude dishonesty, you scoundrel!

[Achilles, calm down, it's just a game.]

But what means this, the notes of the cliff? Your speech lacks all sense to me.

[dbag]

Scoundrel?

[ This is incredible, he's never been called a scoundrel before. It's sort of hilarious. ]

Oh, my god, yes, please, call me a scoundrel. I love that, it makes me sound like a pirate.

[ Totally not answering his Cliff's Notes question because he's dumb and who cares about your questions, Achilles!!! ]

[heelies]

Then again I shall call you a scoundrel! No honorable man should find in an insult a suitable name for himself, and thus you give all the proof I require.

[So pour that into your tripod and toss some barley on it.]

[dbag]

[ He rolls his eyes like, yeah, yeah, I'm dishonorable, we get it. Insult his shoes or eyebrows if you really want to hurt him, come on. ]

'Kay, cool, and I'll call youuuu... rascal! No, scallywag. Oh, my god, we have nicknames for each other, we're basically BFFs now. When do we start braiding each other's hair and talking about boys?

[heelies]

I would not allow one such as yourself within a spear throw of a single hair upon my head.

[dbag]

...Do you just not understand sarcasm, or are you doing this just to be annoying? I honestly can't tell. Is sarcasm a thing in Ye Olde Ancient Times? [ He has his time periods so wrong, WHATEVER ]