VIDEO; UN: COOLSKELETON95

[boneafide]

Hello, everyone!

[And to those who have yet to see a talking, walking skeleton, here you go.]

I wanted to first say good job to everyone who helped the villagers to safety! And also thank you to those who helped protect everyone! Everyone really did their best out there, and I think ALASTAIR will be very proud of us! I know I am. Hopefully now there can be attempts for real peace between the humans and the goblins!

[Although he doesn't agree exactly on the way everything went down, there's no point in bringing that up when he's trying to congratulate everyone.]

I do have another thing I wanted to ask, though.

[He rubs subconsciously at his wrist, and continues.]

I haven't heard from Koltira at all. I've tried calling him a few times, but he isn't answering his phone. So if anyone has seen him in the past few days, please let me know! I am worried about him.

Comments

video. un: G.SLQHV

[twinpeak]

Yeah, real... proud.

[ His words are halfhearted, though, like he's distracted by something. After a few beats: ]

Dude, are you actually a skeleton?

[ Askin' the real questions here. ]

[boneafide]

As much a skeleton as you are a human, human!

[He sure seems cheerful about it.]

[twinpeak]

Whoa.

[ Very cheerful, indeed. ]

I didn't know living skeletons were a thing! That's... pretty cool, actually.

[boneafide]

Not a lot of humans do! And I am actually very cool, thank you!!

I just realized, I never introduced myself!! My name is THE GREAT PAPYRUS!!!

What do you go by?

[twinpeak]

[ Oooo, it's like he's being let in on a COOL NEW SECRET, too. ... Even if it isn't here, not really. ]

—It's Dipper! Just Dipper. I, uh, don't have a title or anything.

[boneafide]

WELL!! Maybe you should! Here, I'll think of one for you...

The FANTASTICAL DIPPER!

No, no, that's too long.

The EXCELLENT DIPPER!

Hmmm... I'VE GOT IT!

THE CHIPPER DIPPER!!!

[twinpeak]

[ .............. Um........ ]

No offense, but I think I'm gonna pass on that one.

[boneafide]

... The Dandy Dipper?

[twinpeak]

Onnnn second thought, titles are kinda a mouthful, y'know? I should probably just stick with my name.

[boneafide]

Oh, alright! Dipper it is. It's nice to meet you, regardless!

[twinpeak]

—Right! Same to you, man. Since this is something like a rare meeting if guys like me don't normally get to talk to skeletons and all.

[boneafide]

At least on the world I'm from, humans and monsters couldn't hang out together. But now that I'm here, I can!! I love the Surface!!

[twinpeak]

The "surface"...? How come you couldn't meet people?

[boneafide]

Yes! Monsters lived in the Underground, and humans lived on the Surface. I could meet other monsters, of course! But I've never seen so many humans before!! It's very exciting!!

[twinpeak]

Huh. Strange, but fascinating. Back home I'd run into monsters all the time, but none of them were ever as, uh, excited as you.

[boneafide]

You saw monsters ALL THE TIME?? You must be from one of those worlds where monsters weren't banished Underground for a thousand years!! How exciting!! Tell me about it!! Did you meet any other skeletons?!?

[twinpeak]

[ Did he say banished? Well, that explains some things, and Dipper takes a mental note of it. ]

Nope, you'd be the first! ... Unless zombies count? They're kinda like skeletons, except they come with a lot more rotting flesh and a craving for brains.

[boneafide]

I understand you have limited knowledge in this area, but no, not really. Skeletons are skeletons and zombies are zombies!

[ He's very assertive about this difference, for some reason. ]

I don't know any zombies myself though! What about other monsters, like bunnies or dogs or fire??

[twinpeak]

... Right. Huge difference there.

[ THANK YOU for listing all those differences, bro. Ya know how to help a guy out. ]

Do... bunnies count as monsters in the Underground?

[boneafide]

[ Dipper really doesn't want to hear Papyrus' theory on humans being descendent of skeletons. No sir. ]

Do Surface bunnies walk on two feet and talk and run town inns?

[twinpeak]

[ Oh. ]

Nah, all they do is hop around and look cute. Not quite hotel running material there.

[boneafide]

That's pretty weird! What about fish people, spider people, or ghosts??

[twinpeak]

Hmmm... Does a merman count? They're basically fish people, right? But there was definitely that one spider lady—pretty creepy, if I had to say so. Had my fair share of ghosts, too.

[boneafide]

Wowie!! You really have met tons of monsters on the Surface already!! That's amazing!! And they got along with you humans, right??

[twinpeak]

[ Dipper pauses. Papyrus is so... enthusiastic and jovial that he isn't quite sure he wants to answer with, well, actually, not usually. Time to dance around this. ]

... Most people don't really believe in the supernatural or monsters. They're kinda—I dunno, hidden away from society, y'know? I didn't either, until I went looking for them over the summer.