TEXT. UN: LOKI. FILTERED TO LOST ON AN ISLAND.

[selfimage]

[ the only thing worse than being stranded on a desert island in some random corner of the multiverse was being stranded on a desert island in some random corner of the multiverse without your divine powers. alas, for the last week of abandonment, Loki's been sour, quick to temper, and unshaven. several times his mind has wandered to the trials of his own brother and his binds to mortality through his former alternate human persona: Doctor Donald Blake. that had been a punishment and a lesson, here it just seems like he's hindered.

but today, he seems in somewhat higher spirits. ]

Fellow ALASTAIR members:

During my mid-morning walk in the depths of a rather sad and dreary jungle, I happened upon a certain something rather out of place. It was a hatch, made of metal, long unused. Not able to keep my curiosity from getting the best of me, I picked the padlock (I'm not answering any questions about this) and found an underground shelter that was once filled with provisions. As we're undergoing a rather awful streak of bad luck, it seems that there wasn't much of use. However!!! Pause for dramatics, please- there were some items still salvageable:

x1 ""something"" akin to a mortal lighter to set things aflame (kind of fun)
x3 containers of water (boring)
x1 a pocket tool of many tools (so-so)
x15 long, sharp objects that are known as swords, commonly used for stabbing

Our Dakal friends were prepared, in rather sharp condition, if you get my drift. :) All hands are welcome to remove them from their underground prison, and anything you can use to find to whet them- well, that's all the better!

Now, there's the question of the bunker and the jungle, but I suppose that's a story for another time.

[ while he can usually out-think his way out of anything, this seems to sate his current battle against his uselessness. ]

Comments

text | username: NAILS

[nichocolatine]

[ well that was long-winded. he's happy they decided to list the finds — makes it a lot easier to parse through the stuff that isn't all that relevant to him, tbh. ]

Whatcha want for the lighter?

[selfimage]

[ it's for all of those who don't like the tl;dr. he was thoughtful this time. ]

It wasn't intended for exchange. That said..... what would you like to offer?

[nichocolatine]

[ what a benevolent god ]

After you just said you didn't want anything for it?

[ that said.. ]

I got
x1 semi-complete cone shell

It's pink

[selfimage]

Ugh, please. You can do better than that, I'm sure.

[nichocolatine]

Tough crowd
How 'bout—
x1 slightly dinged up metal canister, tobacco-scented, soon to be emptied

[selfimage]

That's a little counter-intuitive.
But I'm a god of good will and even better deals.

Tell me, what are you good at?

1/2

[nichocolatine]

[ ... ]

2/2

[nichocolatine]

Not staying away from gods and the like, apparently

[ all y'all magical creatures... let him rest in peace ]

I can see where you're heading, buddy, and I gotta say
I tend to charge for a helluva lot more than some dinky lighter
S'it special? What's got it earning so many quotation marks huh

[selfimage]

Supply and demand.
It's not like I see many other like it here, on this remote, desert, abandoned, sad little island.

Prices fluctuate.

[nichocolatine]

Goddamn capitalism

[ fine, fine... ]

If ya want information, I can get it for ya [ except he's at a considerable disadvantage when the layout of the land keeps changing on him ]
If ya want something shot at, I can shoot it for ya [ except he's down to a little more than one magazine left on him ]

I can also sew [ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ]

[selfimage]

[ oh, perfect. the promise of fire attracts all kinds. ]

One favor, then.
I'll share it with you while we're on this island; you'll keep it when we leave.
That is, if the device is to your liking, which I'm certain it will be.

Deal?

[nichocolatine]

[ there is a pretty blatant moment of hesitation here, making the redhead grateful for his decision to answer in text. he takes care to keep his mind blank, to avoid revealing anything that his silence hasn't revealed already, but he's been in the business of give-and-take for a long time now, and if he's learned anything, it's that the value of transparency is immeasurable.

back in the underground, favors never meant anything good.

suppose it's a good thing he's used to getting his hands dirty. ]

Deal.
You gonna come back to semi-civilization or am I gonna hafta look for ya?

[selfimage]

[ he knows that pause. Loki's a trickster, a man good at juggling debt. it's still a gamble, but it's to their advantage, Loki more than this Nails fellow, but he figures that there's something that any good dealer knows: the house always gets the curve. ]

That depends on how quickly you want to call in your end of the bargain.

text; un: coolskeleton95

[boneafide]

I WOULD LIKE A SWORD!!

[ Says the monster least likely to use it. ]

[selfimage]

[ help it's this guy. skeleton. bones. corpse person. ]

And I'd like some new clothes and a hot bath.

[selfimage]

JK you can have a sword.
Can you give me a hand?



Don't take it off.

[ wait. ]

Can you? Take it off?

[boneafide]

I HAVE NEVER TRIED BUT I HAVE A FEELING THAT THAT WOULD BE A PERMANENT THING THAT WOULD ALSO NOT BE ENJOYABLE.

text; un: swan

[sheriffing]

I could use a sword, I'll help.

[She'd rather have a gun, but ALASTAIR never cares about what she wants.]

[selfimage]

Wonderful! You've got yourself +1 sword.
I do have one condition. Something super small, you won't even notice.

[selfimage]

[ Loki, trolling the skeleton backfired last time. ]

A shame. That would've been a clever joke.
Regardless, you'll look properly menacing with a sword.

How good are you at making laser noises?

[boneafide]

[ It takes a certain level of trolling for him to fall for, unfortunately. ]

AMAZING. I'M EXTREMELY WELL PRACTICED AT FIGHTING SOUND EFFECTS! I CAN ALSO MAKE GOOD EXPLOSION SOUNDS.

[selfimage]

Consider yourself a proud owner of a new sword.
Of course, I'll need to give you some insight on the specifics of the sound effects, but with your solid background in noise making, I'm sure that you'll be a natural. :)

[boneafide]

THIS SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT EXCHANGE. YOU, PROVIDING ME WITH KNOWLEDGE AND SWORDS, AND I, WAVING AROUND SAID SWORD, GOING 'PEW PEW.'

[selfimage]

Pew pew and pssshhew and nnnnnnnnn, etc. etc.
Someone has to save the world.

[boneafide]

I CAN MANAGE ALL OF THOSE, AND MORE.

IT TAKES GREATNESS TO SAVE THE WORLD, BUT LUCKY FOR YOU, AND EVERYONE ELSE HERE, WE ARE ALL VERY GREAT!