futurology | video; username: baaaan

[With one hand stretched out and the other holding onto something mounted over his shoulder, Ban popped in on his own post. He looked somewhat dizzy, throwing himself to the side very suddenly. Landing on his feet, Ban looked as if he had just rolled off of the side of a horse--one belonging to an unconscious Masamune Date. Ban shifted the load on his shoulder before tossing him over the back of the horse. At that point, one would be able to see his face in the midst of being knocked out, slumped over the horse.

He looked as if he had been tossed in the dirt--which was pretty much what happened.]

Hey. [Ban gave Masamune's cheek a little smack. He gave him another one. He even settled for pinching his nose shut for a little. Nothing happened.]

Need some heeeelp~. I gave him a pat on the back and he got knocked out.

[Then, Ban lifted a bottle of liquor to his lips--one that apparently came out of nowhere--drinking it back for a few moments before returning to what he was saying.]

Someone wanna take a look at him? There's gotta be somebody who likes this guy~. So, hurry up before I start tryin' to treat him.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Well, now. What looked like a good reaction turned on Ban immediately. He had survived by being able to read peoples' thoughts by their expressions, before he became immortal.

When people were shocked and enraged, their pupils dilated. It was an instinctual reaction.

Sieglinde's eyes were too focused. She saw right through it.]

Well, now~.

[Ban rubbed Masamune's throat with his fingers, the blood disappearing as he let it soak back into his own skin. He didn't need to 'collect' what he lost, but his body was fairly good at soaking it up, regardless. Pointedly, Ban also let a drop of his blood fall on Masamune's upper lip--though, it was unseen at that angle.]

I thought you were just come cocky brat~. Looks like you've got a decent head on yer shoulders, after all.

[Acting, unfortunately, wasn't one of Sieglinde's fortes. Healing, observation, the hard sciences and creation... But her bluffs crumbled in the end.

And she doesn't like what observation is telling her- that blood wasn't wiped away, it was... Absorbed.]

Then it seems you were the cocky one.

'Were'~? Still am, brat.

[Unlike most people, Ban was keen on making certain that people knew what sort of man he was. He didn't bother hiding or making excuses for himself.

If anything, he was completely contrary to that. Ban enjoyed assuming blame for a number of reasons.]

Don't tell me yer the sorta midget to get elated after one little victory ♪.

Then that is something best to correct here, in a world full of those whose powers and natures you can not know.

[She couldn't know- it looked like the blood had returned from whence it came... But how to be sure?]

[Finally, she sounded as if she really understood the situation.

Though, her look of scrutiny wasn't something born solely from understanding his trick. She looked pensive, as if it was a puzzle to her.]

Yeaaah, you got it ♪. Lemme tell ya' something handy.

Know-it-alls are just idiots who haven't been proven wrong enough, yet ♪. Soon as you get that through your skull, the sooner you'll stop bein' an easy mark.

[She's definitely going to get wrinkles at this rate, with the expression on her face.

If she felt like arguing, (and she really did), Sieglinde would point out that he had no idea what she could do, while she had one idea about him-

But she keeps it back, barely.]

An easy mark to what- knock unconscious like a thug?

See, that's why you're an easy mark~.

[Ban survived getting hit with surprises left and right as a child. Adaptability made a thief and hardship made a master. It didn't take much for him to tell just how much Sieglinde wanted to say as opposed to what she was actually allowing herself to.]

Guys like me ain't the ones you gotta worry about ♪. A sweet enough drink can mask the deadliest poison~.

I think you've had more than enough sweet drink for us to avoid such metaphors.

[She knows what he's trying to say- but that doesn't throw her from the current track of who she's angry with.]

Sweet~?

[Ban sat down, leaving Masamune be for the moment.

Teasing the little girl seemed to be an alright way to pass the time.]

Brat, have you ever even had a drop a' liquor ♪?

[Well, if talking to him distracts him enough to ignore Masamune for the time being... talk she can do.]

I've had more than enough ale to know my own limit between merrymaking and foolishness.

[... which isn't even a bluff. She mostly drinks ale with dinner. Life in remote medieval German villages.]

Ahhh~? You're sayin' it like there's a barrier between those two things.

[Said the criminal famous for having little to no filter and a sense of restraint.]

To civilized people, I believe there tends to be. A single mug can make that difference.

[SNIFF]

Just one drink?

[There was a curious look when she sniffed.]

And, you better watch that cold attitude of yours, brat ♪. You might come down with somethin'.

Can be the difference between a pleasant drunk and a fool, yes.

[Don't dare imply she can only handle one herself!!!]

You kiddin' me~? Bein' a fools the best part of drinkin'. Why do you think people go outta their way to make ale taste so good in the first place?

[It didn't help that Ban was a severe alcoholic in this opinion of his.]

Because why drink something that didn't taste good?

[That's why, duh?]

Well, two drinks in and you stop caring for the taste. It's all about gettin' folks past the first drink!

[Or else you've got a lot of wasted beer...]

And into foolishness, yes, yes.

Naaah~. People drink 'cause they wanna go outta their minds. What's so foolish about makin' an intentional decision~?

Because there are far easier and safer ways to intoxicate oneself.

...What, like eatin' bad mushrooms?

[He was talking to a child about this.]

There are any number of potent combinations of herbs and certain extracts that can cause the same effects as drinking to excess.

[She's talking to an idiot adult about this...]

Sounds like you'd be overthinking the purpose of it all~. Chemical concoctions ain't as exciting as entertaining as a good piiint, after all.

Sure ain't as easy to celebrate with on the spoooot ♪.

You seem to be forgetting that ale itself doesn't conjure itself from thin air.

video; username: baaaan

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