video ◐ un: man of still

[figureitout]

[ Good day, recruits! Today, the network graces you with the image of a teenager, sitting in front of... a wide array of weird things. There's a pile of coconuts, some broken tree branches and some obsidian scattered around him. Stiles' expression can be best described as a determined grimace, and the brief wave he gives before starting to talk is haphazard at best. ]

Okay, so-- I don't know about you guys, but I'm definitely not going to wait around for the goddesses to get wind of what the Timeline told us to do, so I thought I'd, uh, start a self-defense... thing. In case Ryba decides she'd rather get rid of all of us before we even start thinking about getting rid of her.

[ Not that he is all that opposed to killing both Ryba and Nalanni, really; if the goddesses are gone, the world survives. If they live, the world dies. If they're sent somewhere else, who knows if the same thing happens there, too, and they just inflict this same situation on some unsuspecting planet. He has no trouble picking out the lesser evil here. ]

I wasn't around when people were building the bomb, but I heard the bomb itself was fine, even if the result wasn't. I still need some more stuff [ he gestures at the pile of things in front of him, a pile decidedly lacking some necessary ingredients ] and no clue how to get them so... I guess my point here is, those who were involved in building the bomb? Some help would be helpful.

[ It seems like that's going to be it, but then the video swims back into focus, almost like another thought has occurred to him. ] Also, before anyone gets on my case about "how can you do that we can't kill anyone", please notice how I said self-defense. That means exactly what it sounds like, I'm building these to make sure no one kills me. Or, uh, anyone else out of the recruits, actually. I mean, have you seen me? I'm not exactly goes-out-to-kill-people material. [ As in, he has literally zero knowledge in martial arts or shooting a gun or any powers whatsoever. (Nogitsune notwithstanding, he's trying very hard not to think of that.) Sarcasm is his only defense... outside of the bombs, thankyouverymuch. ]

Oh, and if anyone has a clue if these even work against divine beings, now'd be a good time to tell me. [ Loki, he's looking at you. You and everyone else god-material around here. ]

( ooc: stiles doesn't know it, but the bombs do work! and if anyone would like the threads to go from video to action and help building the bombs, that is a-okay with me! for anything else regarding the use of these particular bombs, hit me up over on plurk @ celen c: )

Comments

( audio | un: skywalker )

[apoptotic]

What are you missing?

[ guess who's out of the force and out of fucks to give.

eeeeeeeeeeeey. ]

i'm so sorry for this kid

[figureitout]

Everything that's not coconuts, wood and obsidian.

[ As... you could see, in the video. That is why he showed the whole thing, wow, way to miss the point Anakin!!

Stiles, though, pauses and. and stares. at the username. The voice itself doesn't reveal much, but-- ]

So... nice handle, by the way. [ Is he a fan or is he an acTUAL--

NO HE CAN'T EVEN THINK THAT THAT IS TOO EXCITING OF A POSSIBILITY.

Also he should probably focus on the bomb-building here and the fact that this guy is maybe offering him assistance. ]

are you tho

[apoptotic]

[ wow, he doesn't know if you're storing the flowers somewhere no one can accidentally breathe them!! ]

It's my name. [ drily, dryer than the atacama desert, in fact ( so dry it receives an average 15mm of rainfall per year. ) ]

I can get the the sea urchins. [ metal hand, yo. ] Where should I drop them off?

voice, @TARANTO

[heavyhitter]

Oh shit, nice plan. I'm on board. [ a beat ] Careful with the sea urchin part, though.

[figureitout]

Great! All aboard the SS Bombsquad.

[ Also that, that is some information he... would have probably been able to work out for himself. But hey, thanks anyway! ]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure you can't be anything but careful with sea urchins. The spikes are toxic, right?

video | un: RHY5-W1NZ

[dbag]

It's your lucky day. —Except for the part where you're on a dying furry planet with vengeful deities, that part's... not... so great.

[ He clears his throat. MOVING ON. ]

You happen to have an expert bomb builder in your midst.

[ """"""expert"""""" ]

[figureitout]

[ ............. oh my god, that username though. ]

Yeah, it's been established this sucks. That's kinda why I'm launching the Let's Not Get Killed program here. [ And if someone wants to use that program to further the Let's Kill The Goddesses program? So not on him. ]

Wait, do I? [ Pauses. ] You? You're an expert on building bombs. [ Excuse his slight disbelief, because from his previous conversation with Rhys, he didn't exactly come across as someone who'd go around building dangerous devices in his spare time. ]

video; un: king

[agrizzlysin]

[STRAIGHT TO THE POINT:] I know where to find the flowers.

[figureitout]

[ FINALLY, someone who is offering actual helpful information instead of just "oh yeah I can help you" without actually saying anything of substance! ]

Awesome, okay, where is that?

video; un: poindexter

[weirdologist]

[Well this is the most sensible thing he's heard since this whole debacle started, and an actual plan to boot. Gj, Stiles. Ford taps his chin, pursing his lips together. Though there are perhaps a few holes in the idea, such as the boy questioned whether or not they would even work against the goddesses, he nods, a small smile flicking across his face.]

I was part of the bomb making team, so I will try to help you as I can, my boy. A good offence is the best defence after all, as the saying goes.

[He pauses.]

I would suggest not breathing in the pollen from the flowers, however.

[figureitout]

[ Hey, look, it's... an old dude with six fingers. Both are points Stiles notes and then elects to ignore; "old" is only another way of saying "life experience points 100", and who even cares about the number of fingers you have, I mean, really. His best friend has claws; hard to judge, after that. ]

Yeah, that's kinda what I was going for. [ He grins, quick and sharp, though it changes into a puzzled frown... taking in the warning and trying to figure out why it's given. ]

Okay, I won't. I mean, I haven't even found the flowers yet, so that's a work-in-progress... but, uh, why? Out of curiosity. Is it poisonous? Because it would've been really nice for that list of ingredients to actually include some notes like that.

voice; un: sakurakinomoto

[keystaff]

It's okay if you aren't wanting to be right up there fighting. I won't be either. I'm going to help Sieglinde-chan with some potions, for anyone who might get hurt.

[But self-defense is still a good idea! Sakura is just less sure on her own ability in that regard outside of her use of the Sword card, the bow she is learning to use with Graham, her natural athleticism. She has no actual training in hand to hand or making weapons, nothing like that.]

But um. This might help! I might come have a look. If you do figure this. I should learn as much as I can too.

[figureitout]

You're... making potions. As in, healing potions?

[ She is so not a doctor, unless that's a doctor with a ridiculously young-sounding voice... but, hey, whatever. He'll roll with it. Among all the possible things, kids knowing how to heal is hardly the strangest one. ]

... huh. Is that something everyone can do? I mean, the potions. Because if it is, uh, maybe we can trade? I show you how to make bombs [ if he figures out how to do it, that is ], you show me how to heal.

video | un; sieglindesullivan

[grunehexe]

Is that what you call "self-defense"?

[Cause it sounds like a weapon to be used in an attack. She isn't going to stop anyone from killing the goddesses, but. Just saying.]

[figureitout]

Um, yeah?

[ Stiles rolls his eyes, seriously, did she even pause to think of it? ]

Like, sure, you can go and learn basic self-defense moves and then wait for the goddesses to magic you before you can even think choke hold. The point of self-defense is to be able to defend yourself, and this? This'll definitely do that.

[ Sure, if others want to take shooting lessons or wait for their magic maybe to come back, they're free to do that! Stiles just isn't going to wait around and hope that the goddesses can't stop a bullet mid-air. ]

( voice | un: yatagarasu )

[skatebird]

If you're worried about protecting yourself, wouldn't it be easier to learn actual self defense?

today on: how to make friends 101

[figureitout]

Wow, that's such a good idea! Why didn't I just think of that?

[ Wait for it... ] Oh, I know, because if Ryba decides she wants us dead, any of us, what do you think will happen? There she is, using her goddess powers on me -- but wait, that's fine, I can karate-chop at her?

Yeah. [ Is everyone here an actual idiot?? Actual self-defense is all good and nice and fine, against non-magical people. Goddesses? Definitely not part of that category. ]

text; @magnusficent

[warlocks]

[ Magnus is still steadfastly refusing to be involved, but also he can't really let some kid stumble around blindly.

anyway, have a picture of the red flowers you need, Stiles. ]

you need to grind these up, by the way, not just pluck them for your bouquet. i suggest you find a friend to potentially babysit you should you breathe any of it in.

[ look, he's not saying Stiles seems like the kind of guy who would accidentally breathe this stuff in no matter how many warnings he gets, but... ]

[figureitout]

[ Wow, look at all these helpful people! They totally have a team going on here. A somewhat scattered, reluctant and alarmingly murderous team, but a team nonetheless. ]

so what i'm getting here is that i need to somehow grind these into a powder while magically not breathing at the same time?

seriously, how did you guys manage this the first time around?

[ ... probably with the help of said babysitters. Though he has high hopes someone will actually join him and he can guilt-trip them into doing that grinding while he stays far, far away from the flowers. So far there's practically the Atlantic between him and them. ]

(Text | UN: Courtesy )

[stonebird]

Stiles? Do we have no divine being on our side? No one we can pray to for protection?

(Hi. I'm terrified. Nice to meet you.)

voice;

[figureitout]

Alayne?

[ Ah, shit. Of course she'd be... less than comfortable with this whole goddesses thing. ]

Uh... I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but I'm pretty sure the answer is a solid "no". There's different gods in different worlds... and the ones here don't exactly love us.

audio; un: 82736775

[ricksybusiness]

I heard bombs, so I'm in. [He pauses, considering.] Ex-except the part where you said "self defense." Let's, uh... let's walk back to that.

[figureitout]

Hey, dude, you want to go and blast away some gods? Be my guest. I'm just- look, there's such a thing as "painting a mark on your back", and while I'm big on getting rid of people who want to kill me, I'm also really big on, you know, not getting killed.

[ Which. throwing bombs at goddesses? would probably do the trick. ]

text | @red, hi I'm late

[gutpunching]

["Man of Still" still sounds like a very particular reference. After snooping through some of the above conversations like a grade a stalker—]

The wood was only used for the delivery mechanism. Might want to look into it anyway, unless you plan on decreasing the yield of the original recipe.

[A bomb big enough to kickstart a volcanic eruption probably isn't the kind you toss around like a grenade, so they'd want to launch them from a distance. But maybe they can make some adjustments if they decide to get creative. (Without, you know, blowing off a limb or two in the process.) Jason actually studied the fine art of blowing shit up for a while. Which only goes so far when the bombs are made of flowers and fish bits, but he's got steady hands and a preference for being prepared, that probably counts for something.]

Where are you set up?

[He already knows, since he listened in on the talk with Anakin. But, you know. To be polite.]

<3 no worries!!

[figureitout]

[ Jason would be completely right in thinking it a reference, if not strictly only a reference. And, hey, some snooping around is smart, if Stiles is asked (and he isn't). ]

... huh. Hey, thanks for pointing that out. I guess it'd be useful, I mean, I'm not sure if the bombs are exactly the throw-and-run type.

[ Not like Molotov cocktails. ]

Near the temple. Want to pitch in?