video; un: PERIDOT5XG

[slapfight]

Since we have our new marching orders, and are preparing to depart relatively soon, I feel as if I should go on record admitting my one weakness.

[she makes an agitated noise.] I'm not good at blending in.

[she holds up her hands, suddenly excited.]

But! But I have learned that the one thing that sets me apart is that I'm considered to be very funny. So by using my natural gift for comedy, I will surely keep the natives off guard while we plan out our strategies.

The problem is I don't have many jokes. The one about the chicken, while hilarious, will probably lose its charm after awhile, so in the name of preserving teamwork, I ask of you, my fellow Audentes, to give me, the great and lovable Peridot, your best jokes.

Comments

[competing]

[ ...................................... ]

Neat.

[ sorta like the balmerans! or the balmera! or both. ]

I know some aliens that are sorta like that. They're real cool. Helped us out in a pinch a few times!

[slapfight]

Hhhuh. They must not have as many limitations placed on their society. Homeworld gems don't... help other lifeforms.

[but maybe... no. that's ridiculous.]

[competing]

Well, to be fair, we kinda saved their lives first. [ and freed them from indentured slavery, but you know. ]

But they seemed like real nice people despite that!

[slapfight]

[and here's where Peridot gets a little blunt.] Oh my stars. I see now. So they're just really bad at this. There's nothing in the universe that the gem army would need to be saved from. Clearly they're the beta of inorganic rock-based species.

[competing]

Hey hey hey — [ he puffs up a little, defensive. ] They're not an army, okay? They're a really nice, really peaceful civilization! Who just so happen to maybe be made of rocks, who love on a rock planet that creates these really cool, really useful crystals, and is also totally alive and sentient!

[ well. it can feel things. and talks to the balmerans! ]

[slapfight]

A sentient planet?

[she wants to say that's impossible, but admittedly she is well aware that she's a rock.

still.

what??]

[competing]

[ ............. ]






What — like that surprises you??

[slapfight]

If any planets were even remotely sentient in our universe, Homeworld's colonization process would have been much more difficult. We would know.

[competing]

Yeah, well, they're totally sentient in mine.