text; un: shitpost king

[hedonistic]

we interrupt ur regularly scheduled shitposting to bring u this public service announcement

i'd avoid the general area around the dollarclub if i were u
unless u wanna claw someone's eyes out for ur favorite energy drink, anyway - it's all gone to hell with riots

i hope u all have brushed up on ur zombie apocalypse cliches

ngl it's getting pretty intense over here
saw these two guys fighting over a crate of soup and one of them just shoved the other right in front of a car backing out of its parking space
blood and bits of brain splattered everywhere

kinda gets a guy thinking, huh? all that stuff about morality and empathy and compassion that's supposed to be so important
and at the first sign of danger, people just ready to kill each other over soup

i wonder what people in wakefield are thinking, right about now
probably real grateful for that quarantine keeping these animals outta their city
they'd never do anything so horrible, of course

would they?



would you?




p.s.: someone with a certain kind of priorities took off with a case of beer, but they dropped a few cans
they probably taste like murder and guilt, but well
free booze, if u want it

Comments

[hedonistic]

[She'll find him making a beer pyramid with said free murderbooze. Because what else does one do for twelve minutes with booze you're not drinking yourself?

When someone approaches, he has a fairly strong hunch it's the person from the network, but because it's Kagari and nothing can ever be simple:]

What's the password?

[cashlin]

The password is 'gimme my free booze'. Cough it up.

[And because it's free, she swipes the very top can of the pyramid, cracking it open with a fizzy hiss.]

Also, way to piss off all the moralizers on this team, dude. You know that attitude is kinda freaky from someone who is used to this kind of stuff, right? [Lilith takes a punctuating swig and wipes her mouth with the back of her hand.] Not that I give a damn, you can do what you want.

[hedonistic]

[Alas for his poor, short-lived pyramid, we hardly knew ye.]

Pissing people off is my best talent, okay. You can't stifle genius like that, it'd be like caging a bird.

[ha ha hA HA aren't jokes the funniest when there's a layer to them the other person wouldn't get]

Soooo. Lilith, huh? I'm Kagari.

[cashlin]

Hey, if you wanna flap your wings and shit on everybody's heads, it's none of my business.

[She doesn't sound especially offended, though, taking another thoughtful sip of her murderbeer. ain't no thang.]

'Sup, Kagari. Are all the missions here like this? Our teammates sound kinda rattled.

lord this is late, i'm sorry

[hedonistic]

Dunno, this is my first one.

[s h r u g]

I hear the last one was basically "Invasion of the Bodysnatchers", though. So, y-m-m-v on which is more fucked, and all that.

im late too it's fine

[cashlin]

Hmmm. Zombies, or body-snatching monsters?

[She getsures, casually, with her beer.]

Think I like this better. Creepy crawlies are no big deal, but I don't like the thought of something that could take over your brain.

[hedonistic]

Yeah, gotta agree--I prefer not being functionally dead, even if "crazy cannibal" isn't exactly an ideal situation to end up in.