text; un: shitpost king

[hedonistic]

man i was originally gonna bitch about finally getting my gaming handheld without any way to charge it but

we're like, literally in neko atsume right now so i can't even be mad

can we make cat planet our new home base, it's pretty much objectively superior to oska in every way
except the magic kitchen i guess

still
talking cat planet

[kagari has #priorities]

so, did anyone else get offered catnip
or more to the point, did anyone actually try it
because i'm legitimately fucking tempted ngl

Comments

[heavyhitter]

you gotta have hope, what's with all the grizzled crusty old naysayers on this team
hold hope in your heart that one species's favorite recreational drug can cross the bounds of race to get another one high too, it's beautiful when you think of it like that

[scrap_metal]

Are you trying to educate me on hope? If so, picking intoxication as a reason for it, makes it seem even more obsolete.

Don't they have alcohol in Oska, or whatever else the main base is?

[heavyhitter]

yeah but notice how we're not IN oska
oska could be blowing up right now or something, then we'd never have alcohol again

still text, I'm just on phone and lack pretty coding

[scrap_metal]

And how's that a problem?

[ such cruel obliviousness ]

Not Oska blowing up, obviously. That would certainly be an emergency.

[heavyhitter]

ok the REAL problem here is obviously that you clearly don't know how to live a little

[scrap_metal]

[ he's doing the overly far jump to conclusions so--- ]

An alcoholic, I see.

[ because who else would feel so strongly about lack of alcohol for a little while ]

[heavyhitter]

god i fucking wish

[scrap_metal]

That's an odd wish to have. Most people would prefer to be healthy and mentally sound.

[heavyhitter]

most people can still get drunk for more than like 10 minutes at a time

[scrap_metal]

Sounds like an incredibly advanced metabolism. Never thought someone would consider that a problem.

[ but then most people aren't you Genos ]

[heavyhitter]

yeah i guess, it's a superpower
USUALLY great

[scrap_metal]

[ ok now the curiosity starts to take better of him ]

What is so good in being drunk that it makes you resent your "superpower"?

i meant to hop back on this weeks ago i hope this is ok

[hedonistic]

wow for real
that is actually legitimately a tragedy
my sincere condolences for u taranto

[heavyhitter]

yeah thanks it is, so glad SOMEONE around here can appreciate the scope of my suffering

[hedonistic]

i would pour one out for ur ability to get properly wasted but i think that's what we call adding insult to injury

we'll just have to load up on alcohol and make the most of ur ten minute sober-cations when we get our next chance

[heavyhitter]

yeah sounds good
what sounds better, super quick game of truth/dare or never have i ever

[hedonistic]

hmmm what if we did both
never have i ever to get to peak drunk
then rapidfire truth or dare to make use of being trashed
one minute to complete a dare or bust

[heavyhitter]

damn, you don't fuck around
alright i'm in, let's do this

[hedonistic]

i take my shitposting duties very seriously okay

[Obviously these extend to irl shenaniganry too, thus sayeth the king.]

idk if i ever got your actual name btw

[heavyhitter]

do you want me to show you the name directory, or are you just being a gentleman and going for the proper introduction

[hedonistic]

wow no
if there's one thing i won't stand for being accused of, it's being a gentleman
i'm training for the multiversal lazy asshole competition, see
shit like this will give me a real competitive edge

[Or rather, Enforcers in Japan aren't allowed to be anonymous on the internet, and he sort of enjoys texting with people and knowing them by their handle only until it makes sense to exchange names, like just before you're to meet irl for catnip shenanigans. But who needs to be that honest with themselves, right.]

[heavyhitter]

see i thought so
does this mean i know a magitek function the nerd doesn't, i'm gonna declare this day a holiday

[hedonistic]

maybe~

[or maybe not??? maybe he's just being a shit???? who knows]

so are u gonna celebrate by telling me ur name or are u planning to crush a man's championship dreams here

[heavyhitter]

i'm telling you to look that shit up, my fingers are busy
or my texting brain is busy
whatever

[hedonistic]

so cold, ana-chan ♥

[...look he took a guess okay??? the western people he's met so far seem to prefer going by their given name....he Tried.]