TEXT; un: DARK AVENGER? (ambiguously during the 'let's chill' part of the diamond thing)

[blarblade]

[So, there he was. Sitting at a table. Accidentally ordered all of page two and apparently page three of the menu. Had way too much food. And then up came a centaur, one who has two stomachs or whatever and could, in theory, take care of his surplus food problem.

There's just one problem.]

I offered to split lunch with someone and I think she's going to try to kill me. I might need some help.

[Yes, yes it's real now.]

Comments

text; un: I CAN B UR DADDY

[moneyballer]

idk bro

maybe that's just her way of tellin u she likes ya

THREADJACKING

[deemed]

I think it is very likely. Some women can be very aggressive in their amorous pursuits.

video | un: quickfish

[kisha]

[SOMEONE FOUND OUT WHAT OWAIN WAS DOING "IN THE BATHROOM" FOR SO GD LONG]

Are the people of your world so uncultured that they comment to strangers on what they know nothing about?

text; un:odinson

[deemed]

perhaps she wishes to mate with you?

[100% serious]

[blarblade]

[DOES HE LOOK LIKE YET ANOTHER AU VERSION OF YOUR BROTHER? THERE IS NO WALL INVOLVED. THERE IS NO EIGHT LEGGED STEEDS.]

Gods, I don't...
How would that even work???

video | un: quickfish

[kisha]

[WHAT. THE. HELL.]

I ought to cut the tongue from your head.

text; un: deathweaver

[respired]

That does not follow.

[blarblade]

I accidentally ordered page 2 and 3. I needed help.
I made a lot of mistakes.

video | un: quickfish

[kisha]

It does not.

TEXT. UN: LOKI

[selfimage]

You've forgotten the WHY part.

[blarblade]

Because she's the proud warrior type that's why?
You know, the type who challenges you to a duel for the honor of her people?
I think, at least. So she might have to arm wrestle me before she can eat some fries.

video | un: quickfish

[kisha]

Let it be known I had no such intent!

[Had. Past tense.]

text; scottmccall

[banded]

Dude, are you okay??

Where are you?

I'll help!

[Someone had to ask and offer!]

You officially have threadcrashing privileges on that one action thread jsyk

[blarblade]

Are you sure?
Because she's a horse-taguel.
She might be able to run both of us down.

text; un: urahara

[predomination]

You didn't imply she was overweight, did you?

[blarblade]

No! At least I don't think so...
Gods, what if I did.
I'm not sure what would be fat for a...

[And then he made a gesture implying horse-taguel, which was lost because this is text and not actually voice.]

Horse-taguel?

[And then he used his words.]

TXT ( NN ).

[trueborn]

How did you phrase your offer, pray tell? Perhaps it was in the manner you asked.

[blarblade]

REALLY REALLY REALLY BADLY APPARENTLY.
I think she's the proud warrior type and might pull out a sword if I'm not careful.
I had to excuse myself.
I think she Knows.

text; un: cardmaster

[fateality]

Guess you'd better dine and dash, my friend.

[blarblade]

She's a horse!
Well, she's part horse.
But she's got horse legs!
She can run me down if I tried and kick me really hard!

[He also excused himself for five minutes to hit the bathroom, so imagine this being typed while pretending to pee because that's totally what's happening here.]

text; un: steelsamayarai

[feytality]

Did you start eating all her fries!?

[because she'd kill get framed for murder over that]

[blarblade]

I was trying to give her my fries! I accidentally ordered page two AND three!
But now I think I really screwed up!
And this is the second time since I got here.
The second!

[Also, yes. This is text because he's in the men's bathroom stalling for time as of right now you're welcome. Please, ask him why.]

text; un: harmonia

[digiorno]

did you apologize? you might have offended her somehow

this post probably didn't help honestly based on what i've read so far

[blarblade]

I'd shout I'm sorry but I don't think it'll help at this point.
I probably should wait until I can get someone else to save me or until she calms down.
And even then I'm probably stuck for a while.

(PS: did you know Odinson and Loki were related? I didn't. That really weirded me out.)

text; un: demon cyborg

[scrap_metal]

That looks costly. Try arguing for a massive discount, the split might be more manageable then.

[ because of course it must be about money, what else? ]

[blarblade]

I'm not going to make her split it. Co- you're right it's costly, though. I thought I was ordering the second and third meal and then I got two pages instead but I couldn't stop it because it looked good.

audio | un: eight

[sentry]

You really do need somebody looking after you...

[He's some mixture of chagrined and awed by the reality of this, frankly.

Go figure he truly needs guards. Or babysitters. Or some permutation of the two]

Maybe keep in mind not everybody's from the same culture. Hayame's not keen on touching unless she means to throw you [look, he knows from personal experience here] so sharing lunch is probably a similar invasion of her personal space.

This is texted back because of the bathroom thing jsyk

[blarblade]

She was staring at my food and I didn't know she was One Of Us. I thought she was a local person!

text; un: hemlock

[unholey]

In my experience, when a girl is that angry it's usually deserved in one way or another.

You should probably apologize. But given how this post as gone, it's probably too late for you.

R.I.P., whoever thought DARK AVENGER in all caps would be a cool username.

[blarblade]

Yeah I pretty much accepted my fate at this point.
I could fight it but I kinda have it coming.
It could be worse, I guess.
At least I'll have a bunch of people...? Something something something?

un: julius

[viscontree]

Woman can be frightening. Next time I suggest being careful?

What's your situation now?

[ARE YOU OKAY?]

[blarblade]

I'm probably going to have a few broken bones pretty soon, but I've accepted I earned it.

[This is voice now. This should tell you how much he's given up. He's just accepted it. There's an angry centaur who's worked up over the fact he's a prince for some reason, but it's okay. It could be worse.]

text; un: diclonius

[scarredhorns]

Own up to your mistakes.

[blarblade]

I already agreed to get kicked by her when we get back or whatever else they want to make this right what else am I supposed to do?
I'm not gonna apologize to you guys.
Her, sure, but a bunch of you joined in too.

text; un: kurashiki

[18x0]

Was this another attempt at getting cake? I thought you just did that with me :(

[blarblade]

OH.

Oh.


Wait.

No!
Not like that! I just ordered page 2!
And 3. (3 was pretty good.) And I saw her staring and thought that I could have help and gods I screwed up so badly.