text, @TARANTO

[heavyhitter]

ok guys listen i got something i've been thinking about, no one's been able to answer it for me yet
check it out: deer dildos
???
do they use them? it doesn't have to be dildos anything sexy in general, that counts. i'm not buying there's any sentient sexually reproducing species out there that hasn't invented sex toys, so what do deer use. does it have to do with antlers?? i haven't put much thought into deer sex so i'm not working on much here, just tossing out ideas. lemme know, thanks



oh wait one more thing, i really wanna get off this island. i've seen everything and it's boring. these guys suck at technology right? and swimming. oh my god they're so pathetically useless

but WE are way better at both those things! so here's my proposal: we team up and use our evolved smarts and build a floating litter, or popemobile, or something, and get me over to the next island. good, right?? i think we can do it! we got science grandpa AND nerd granduncle running around here, and probably half a dozen other nerds i haven't dug up yet. we can do this. i believe in us. if there's any parties going on on the other islands, let's get me to them.

Comments

[selfimage]

Once everyone gets past the initial shock of their own awkwardness. :)
Ah, to lead a sheltered life.

But no.
You're on your own.

[heavyhitter]

wow way to get my hopes up! what good are you

[selfimage]

Far from any good at all, unfortunately for you.
Though I do have means of getting off this island without the aid of mortal science, but that's another matter entirely.

[heavyhitter]

oh so THAT'S why we keep you around
what's your fancy mysterious means?

[selfimage]

[ give him a mo. ]

~~~**~*~**~TELEPORTATION~***~**~*~*~

[heavyhitter]

oh my god does it come with sparkles irl too

[selfimage]

Like a magical girl transformation. :)

[heavyhitter]

oh my god i NEED to see that in action
can you take people with you or is that a one man show

[selfimage]

There's room in this ride for more than one.
4 or 5 is pushing it, so don't invite all your friends.

[heavyhitter]

aw hell yeah let's go, this is even better than snuggling with koltira on a horse

[ ...on second thought no it's not, but that's okay, she'll try for both ]

[selfimage]

Wait, there's an opportunity to snuggle with Koltira on a horse?
Forget I said anything.

I lied.

[heavyhitter]

no no this first
THEN i'll let you have a turn snuggling him on the horse

[selfimage]

This is borderline cruelty.

[heavyhitter]

you earned it for telling me you can do sparkly teleports, your fault

[selfimage]

Ugh! Now I've learned my lesson! I'm disinclined from telling you fun, sparkly, unicorn-balloon funtimes ever again. :(

[heavyhitter]

come on i told you about the koltira opportunity, i'm doing good things here

[selfimage]

[ a little bit later. ]

I suppose it's no fun to go alone.

[heavyhitter]

that's fucking right, and i'm GREAT company