text, @TARANTO

[heavyhitter]

ok guys listen i got something i've been thinking about, no one's been able to answer it for me yet
check it out: deer dildos
???
do they use them? it doesn't have to be dildos anything sexy in general, that counts. i'm not buying there's any sentient sexually reproducing species out there that hasn't invented sex toys, so what do deer use. does it have to do with antlers?? i haven't put much thought into deer sex so i'm not working on much here, just tossing out ideas. lemme know, thanks



oh wait one more thing, i really wanna get off this island. i've seen everything and it's boring. these guys suck at technology right? and swimming. oh my god they're so pathetically useless

but WE are way better at both those things! so here's my proposal: we team up and use our evolved smarts and build a floating litter, or popemobile, or something, and get me over to the next island. good, right?? i think we can do it! we got science grandpa AND nerd granduncle running around here, and probably half a dozen other nerds i haven't dug up yet. we can do this. i believe in us. if there's any parties going on on the other islands, let's get me to them.

Comments

[babbylon]

Oh, but you did, didn't you?

[Hate to break it to you, Ramir, but...]

I'm still on the dead end of things, dearest.

[heavyhitter]

Oh shit, really? [ she doesn't sound grossed out or disappointed, is delight really the right reaction here? ] Why didn't you say so! I thought you meant you came back or something. Tell Koltira about all this tail you apparently get, it'll make him feel better about being dead.

[babbylon]

Didn't notice on account of how lively I was, eh?! It's surely to be expected...!

[No, Gilgamesh. Gilgamesh, please do not detail your sexual escapades with other recruits over the network.]

[heavyhitter]

[ if only ramir had any shame either, there is no good place for this conversation to go ]

Oh, yeah, I guess. I'd give you like a... 7 on the 'probably not a corpse' scale.

[babbylon]

...?

[Head. Tilt.]

Where did the other three points go? I am clearly a perfect ten in all ways, on all scales.

[heavyhitter]

Aw, have you never been graded lower? Am I really your first? This is such an honor.

[babbylon]

So sassy. Drop by again and we'll make certain you do some revising.

[heavyhitter]

Yeah, maybe. Lancer says I should get laid instead of being useful, so I guess that'd be a good spot to start.

[respired]

Or not.