futurology | Video | UN: cheap steaks

[A tall, scruffy man in an old trenchcoat sends out a message through the jewelry, looking very befuddled at first as he does so.]

Hey! Um, hello? Is this thing on? [He taps at his jewelry a few times.] I bet that did the trick!

So! Hey, pals. I'm Scruffy. ...Wait, no, that's not right! I'm Dick Gumshoe. Detective. At your service, pals!! I can get a lot done, especially now that I've got one of my secret weapons at hand!

[He conspicuously waves a metal detector around.]

In fact, this bad boy just picked up something along the coast! I'm gonna go and... investigate it and all, pals! If anyone wants to lend a hand... sure, go ahead! If it's treasure, we can split it!

[Gumshoe pauses for a moment, and then he chuckles as something comes to mind.]

Oh right! There's one more thing I wanted to ask you all. I stayed up all night wondering about it!! If you could have one of those gift-powers for your own, and you could pick it, what would it be? I think I came up with a pretty smart answer, but I wanna see what you all think!

Um... Gumshoe out, pals!

[ooc: This is what Gumshoe will unearth! You can feel free to assume/handwave that Gumshoe spread word of its discovery after the fact.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

How can it be a secret if you're showing everyone?

[that's not how secrets work.]

[And there's the obvious question...]

Well, um, it's easy! And the reason for that is... um... uh...

...

...a secret! There! Got ya know, didn't I, pal?

[...It sounds very much like something Merlin would say. And he's kept his secret safe, hasn't he? Back home, anyway.]

I guess it's sort of a secret. I've never seen a weapon like that before, what does it do?

[Except that Gumshoe doesn't really have a reason, he just thinks it sounds cool.

And he soon pats the metal detector bravely.]

Well let me tell you what this bad boy can do! If there's anything metal hidden nearby? It can pick up on it right away, without a doubt! And it makes a whole beeping noise to let ya know! Pretty cool, eh, pal?

Uhm...yeah, of course.

[The guy seems pretty excited about it, so there must be something that Merlin's missing.]

But why would you be looking for hidden metal? And why would it be hidden in the first place?

'Cuz there's only two kind of metal that would be hidden: money, or evidence of crimes! ...Well, and stuff that people lose, but that's just a side thing, pal. Anyway, as for why it's hidden? Well, that's the mystery and I'm the detective! It's all part of my job!

Oh! You must really enjoy your job. Otherwise you could just live off of the money that you find.

Oh, of course! I love my job! But the money you can make from finding it buried in the ground... it's off the charts, pal!!

...Except I never really find that much myself... and I guess most of it turns out to just be coins that I dropped...

Look at the bright side, at least you have the perfect tool to help you find them again.

Will you show me how it works sometime?

[He quickly cheers up.]

Good point, pal!

[And he waves it around in his hand.]

I'd gladly show you what this bad boy can do anytime! By the way, pal, what's your name?

[Merlin wouldn't take the credit for that. He seems like a cheerful guy to begin with.]

I'm Merlin.

[Merlin who does not have a last name that's as cool as Gumshoe. Or any last name at all.]

[Well, that's not wrong.]

Merlin, huh? Hey, is that a stage name or your real name? Nice to meet ya, pal!

Stage name? Oh! No, I'm not a performer. I'm a servant.

Just a servant? Really? Well, um... what kinds of serving do you do, pal?

Really. Ah, but I was the manservant to the crown prince! It's a great honor, or so the prince was always telling me.

Whoa! For real, pal?! That makes you practically royalty yourself!

Oh, I wouldn't say that.

[Merlin tries for modesty. And maybe fails a little bit.]

Uhm, you really think the position's that important?

It sounds important to me, pal!

...But now that I think about it... I do serve a prodigy prosecutor! So that makes me pretty important, too! So don't you letting your head swell too much, pal!!

You know what I think?

[Merlin leans forward, lowering his voice like it'll keep things just between the two of them.]

I think they couldn't do it without us.

[Gumshoe gasps and his eyes widen in surprise. Such a scandalous thought!!]

But... but they're so smart!

Well, I don't know about your boss, but mine can be a bit of a dollop head sometimes.

A dollop head?! [Whatever that means, it sounds unflattering.] Well listen here, pal! You'll never catch Mr. Edgeworth dolloping around! No siree! He's a prodigy, that's what he is!!

I suppose Arthur's a bit of both. He is going to be a great king someday.

[Someday. These days he can still be a bit of a dollop head.]

Arthur? Whoa! That sure sounds like a kingly name to me! I think you two'll do just fine, pal!

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