text, @TARANTO, day after the saloon fire

[heavyhitter]

hey guys guess what: blankets!!! me and TF to the fucking rescue, we rustled up like 40 of these bad boys
super cozy, some nice patterns. one of them has a robot wolf on it
it was also all entirely legal

they're ALMOST free, all you gotta do is tell me a story then come get one (i'm by those spiky ass fat plants that bleed if you knock them over)

also since i have 40 and there's more than 40 of us, i guess also pick someone to get cozy with

Comments

[heavyhitter]

i'm on a pile of blankets it's like literally impossible to be uncomfortable here
hit me

[flashbanging]

This here's the story of Davy Crockett's wife. She was a fierce lady by the name of Sally Ann Thunder Ann Whirlwind, and she didn't take no guff from nobody. But she was real sweet, too, sweet enough that hornets would go on and let her use their nest for a Sunday hat, if'n she so pleased.

[ His smooth, warm drawl rolls over the syllables as he talks, interrupted now and then by the sound of a sip from the bottle in his hand. ]

Now, naturally, her husband was right proud of his wife and he liked to boast about it whenever he could. That there was what started the trouble.

[heavyhitter]

okay but what was he boasting about
that his wife could wear bees on sunday

[flashbanging]

[ He laughs. ]

Specifically, he told another fella--name of Mike Fink--that she could wrassle an alligator 'til it got down on its knees and begged for mercy. Mike Fink didn't take too kindly to the notion; folks reckon maybe he was jealous 'cause he ain't had it nearly so good with his own wife, but ... anyhow, he bet Davy Crockett that he could scare Miz Crockett til her teeth came loose and her joints went funny.

[heavyhitter]

[ he'll never know it, but there's a snort behind this text. please never stop cowboying so hard, man. ]

what'd he bet him