text, @TARANTO, day after the saloon fire

[heavyhitter]

hey guys guess what: blankets!!! me and TF to the fucking rescue, we rustled up like 40 of these bad boys
super cozy, some nice patterns. one of them has a robot wolf on it
it was also all entirely legal

they're ALMOST free, all you gotta do is tell me a story then come get one (i'm by those spiky ass fat plants that bleed if you knock them over)

also since i have 40 and there's more than 40 of us, i guess also pick someone to get cozy with

Comments

[gutpunching]

[Wow, really milking the boyfriend for all he's worth, huh. Someone works fast. But turnabout is fair play.]

Ladies first.

[There's his terms. You did say blank check. And maybe he's feeling nosy.]

I'll take my turn after you take yours.

[After all that listening she did, surely she's got some talking in her.]

[heavyhitter]

[ Whoa, look at that, Jason actually asking after something. That's too rare to possibly pass up. ]

Yeah, alright.

[ She settles back again as she considers it, mentally pawing through a few options. It's got to be both something good, and something Sigma hasn't heard already. That second part could be tricky. ]

Uh, lessee... [ oh, shit, she's got it. With a bright-idea smile: ] Sigma, I didn't tell you the one where I almost got kidnapped and murdered, right? In France?

[12inches]

[ Being an eccentric but largely benign and average college student save for the one inexplicably wild roller coaster of a day that takes a good couple hours of backstory to get any good tale-telling out of it, Sigma's more than content to let the renegades beg back and forth for the other's expositions. He's not gonna get in the way of Jason spilling more of his mysterious ways, that's for sure. ]

[ When she asks, his brow furrows briefly, flipping back through all the exploits he's had shared with him. ]

No you— [ Wait. Kidnapped and murdered?? It's like they were made for each other. (Except that's very much not a good thing, and it shows on his face and in the way he straightens up a little beside her.) ] Back up. You have Space-France too?

[ Priorities. ]

And you what—?

[heavyhitter]

No, no, this was France-France, not too far outside Toulouse.

[ But this means she hasn't told the story, right? Right. She looks a little delighted about that, always pleased with a fresh audience. She settles back into her storytelling mode, complete with full gesticulations and an even more dramatically expressive tone than usual. ]

Okay, so I'm with this guy I picked up somewhere in Monaco, Vinh Du. Friendly but kinda dumb, big enough to keep anyone from wanting to mess with him-slash-us. We're headed into town on foot, and this van full of super friendly guys pulls over to let us in. They're all hyped for the company, say they're headed home from a trip out of town and they've been driving forever. I figured they were alright.

So when we said we weren't really going anywhere in particular, just into town to find a place to stay for the night, they got all excited and said we should come back with them, grandma would love to meet us. And who the fuck am I to turn down some French grandma, right? So I say sure, bring us along, and they take us to this kinda rundown place at the edge of town. There's definitely no grandma, but there is some pretty good food and drink, so we go along with it. It's a pretty good fucking party, we both get drunk. Then they start saying that now we should go to grandma's place, it's at the center of town and she'll feed us more, it'll be great. I wasn't sure why we didn't go straight there, but I was too drunk to be too worried about it. No, I didn't start getting a little worried until we piled back into the van and I realized this was definitely not the way into town, we were going further out. And, you know, this was before I was strong, so I had to be careful about shit like a van full of guys taking me somewhere other than where they promised.

Anyway, Vihn Du's fucking smashed at this point, and they keep offering us more as we're driving. I make him stop drinking, for whatever that's worth. We're in this wooded area at this point, and I'm like, yeah, this is where we get gutted. So I start talking about having to pee, play it up real hard, start threatening to pee on their upholstery if they don't pull over. They do, and the fucking second the door opens, I grab Vihn Du and fucking book it. It's pitch black by then, so I get off the road with him, and the next thing I know we're falling into this ravine just off the edge of the road. I pull Vihn Du down and make him shut up, wiggle us down under the fallen leaves, and the guys are pissed. But they can't find us. First they try to play it off like a joke, try and get us to pop out and get back in the van, then they start threatening. Say they know we're still here, and if we wanna make this easy on ourselves we gotta just get back in. We don't fucking move, and eventually it sounds like they're giving up. There's some muttering, some slamming car doors, the van drives off. Vihn Du starts to crawl back up again, but I stop him. You know why? [ Here's a pause for dramatic effect, and for her to look pleased with herself. ] Three car doors slam, but there were four guys. We wait it out. And not five minutes later the fucking van pulls up again. One more car door closes, and then they're gone.

[ Not the closest of calls, but probably the only time she's saved her own life by threatening to pee. She still looks pretty pleased with herself, and tacks on as an afterthought: ] Oh, yeah, and the next day we headed into town. The house was empty, but I found the van and trashed it. Just fucking blew it up. I wanted to find it with at least one of them in it, but I guess you can't get everything you want.

[gutpunching]

[Wow. Well, if nothing else, she knows how to pony up. It's a little rambling, but he did ask for it. And the relative warm of the tent isn't a bad place to kick back and listen. The more rambling and ridiculous it gets, the less he manages to be surprised by it.]

That's too bad. Sounds like they could have used a more memorable sendoff. [Y'know, because not having a van to do it in only stops dirtbags from abducting dumbasses off the road for so long. Only mostly facetiously—]

Didn't your mother ever tell you not to take candy from strangers?