audio | username: olivia

[winces]

[ it's been a long and grueling week of hard work, naive hope, and a desperate need for distraction — but finally, finally, olivia has some good news to share. ]

Good... Hello, all. [ she'd forgotten to check what time it was before beginning this. oops. ] Sorry to bother, but I thought some of you might like to know —

It's possible.

[ exhaustion hangs heavy on her every word, and it is perhaps the true reason she has not opted to do a video this time. but she does not want to worry the rest over something inconsequential, in the long run, because energy can always be regained later. innocent lives, on the other hand, cannot. ]

There is a way to save them, the Deemers. I-It's a very... slim chance. [ she's careful to say this from the get-go, mindful of urahara's own gentle but firm reminders as she worked tirelessly these past few days. ] And it won't... bring them back to what they'd been before this... They actually won't remember anything at all. [ a faint pause, after her voice turns a little low, regretful. perhaps if she'd tried harder— ]

But! [ no no, let's focus on the good here. on that hope. ] It is possible to heal the damage to their minds. We managed to save someone.

[ of the few urahara had managed to keep alive after the extraction, only one among them responded to her fervent healing. ]

He's... doing well. Adjusting. [ despite it all, a part of her wonders if it had been the right thing to do. if his struggles from hereon in would make it all for naught... ]

Um. If you were gifted with the highest level of ALASTAIR's healing magic, or have any advanced healing of your own to spare, and you'd like to help... please contact me. It's... not easy. But it's manageable. [ for it is quite taxing for just one to take on all their own, as haise has been quick to remind her, but she's even more hesitant to lump that burden on someone else. ]

And if you've managed to extract a Taraxa successfully, or you have a Deemer with you... please let us know, too. Thank you.

( ooc; TLDR olivia's max healing alastair abilities makes it possible to save a deemer, post-extraction. she was able to attempt this on some deemers urahara procured his collection of taraxa from. however, it has a very low success rate, on top of the already very low success rate of an extraction, and it leaves the deemer with essentially a blank slate. but!! still!! something???! gently whispers i'm so sorry for only realizing this could be a thing now )

Comments

audio; un:hound

[ofobedience]

Why bother? Perhaps they'd be better off if you killed them.

[He sounds cold and cool and uncaring enough, but the truth is this strikes a nerve in him, something he'd rather look away from but can't. It cuts too close to the bone.]

[winces]

[ her frown is probably noticeable in her tone. ]

Because they should still have the chance to choose.

video; un. flameo hotman!

[twinkle_toes]

If there's a chance, we have to try, right?

[maybe it makes him naive, or stubborn, or childish - all things he's been called before, repeatedly - but he still can't help but cling on to that faint sliver of hope.]

still audio

[winces]

[ oh no a bitty...

but if clinging onto hope is childish, then olivia never wants to grow up. ]

I think so.

AUDIO, UN: BATSHIT

[slushfund]

Well, I stand corrected. (he can admit when he's wrong, but...) Still, it's a tortured fucking existence.

(as long as the change isn't zero percent, it's too late to stop trying. after his run-in with asher and the bandit, hiruma finds it difficult to really make that final decision (it seems right at the time; kill or be killed). all he knows is that he'd rather die than lose the person he is, his goals, precious memories.)

Guess it's like deciding whether to pull the plug on your vegetable of a relative in the hospital — leave it to the family.

[winces]

[ she takes a moment to answer, chewing on her inner cheek to mull over her words. ]

...They may become a blank slate, but that doesn't mean they still can't decide things for themselves. The man I'd worked with, [ she is hesitant to give his name, wanting to grant him as much privacy as she can, ] he's still fully functional, still able to go about his day to day.

It's just that now he has to decide what that day to day will be.

voice | un: Sasaki

[ex_adept136]

That's great news, Olivia... It's good to hear all of your hard work paid off.

[And he believes, especially with her, that focusing on the positive is a good thing. Some hope is better than none. Some potential is better than none. Even one life saved is something.

In an ideal world they'd help everyone, but this is already better than some of them had begun to accept]

I imagine my spells aren't strong enough, but if I can do something to assist you or others, just say the word.

[winces]

[ with haise, she is able to relax a little bit. let out a long sigh and drop the forced levity in her words.

just a bit. ]

You'll get there soon enough, Haise, don't worry. Continue helping the other healers when needed... [ is it just her, or did their team become particularly more reckless than ever? ] That's already more than enough.

video; un: deathweaver

[respired]

[ Well, that's heartening news. He's been pretty low about the cold reality that the Deemers likely could not be salvaged, even after removing the Taraxa slugs.

But ... it sounds like difficult work. ]

Do not go beyond your own limits, Olivia.

still audio!!

[winces]

[ she almost laughs. ]

Who...? Me? I know my limits better than anyone, don't worry.

[ it's the reminder of them that has her trying so hard. ]

un: sieglindesullivan / video

[grunehexe]

What do you mean exactly? They won't remember anything at all about their lives, or is their last memory the day they were possessed?

still audio!

[winces]

The... first one. I mean... there's no real telling what will happen in the future. If this amnesia is permanent or not. [ it looks that way, though. the brain had been pretty terribly damaged. she had to pretty much rebuild the thing from the ground up. ]

But right now it seems like they'll essentially be an entirely new person.

private; audio; un: cardmaster

[fateality]

[Yiiiikes. He's not super thrilled to get involved, but...]

'Fraid my healing powers ain't maxed out yet.

...But if I can lend a hand, you let me know.

[winces]

[ the help is definitely appreciated. and his sentiment is more than enough at this point. ]

Just continue to help the team where they need it. [ pick up some healing slack for the healers (if there are any) who may decide to take this venture on. ]

audio; un: okami

[whatshimadayou]

No.

[winces]

[ ??? ]

No...?

audio; un: urahara

[predomination]

Ahhh~ I'm glad to see it had an effect. [if his kaido would have had any effect at all, he would've tried it by now, so he doesn't have that to offer her.]

[winces]

It did... something, I suppose.

[ she thought it was a good thing, but now she's not so sure anymore. ]

video;

[pummelling]

[He'd nearly forgotten her from that first month spent in Oska, but hearing her voice and seeing her face again jogs his memory well enough. This is the woman who had owned-- or didn't yet own, really-- that ring he'd made off with by mistake...

Which gives his answer just a touch more weight, he supposes.]

If we can give them the opportunity to make their own future-- whatever that future holds-- we should. I can't heal, but I can help capture more Deemers. And find someone capable of extraction, probably.

still audio!

[winces]

[ by now, she isn't quite as excited or hopeful for her news. but despite being riddled with sudden second-guessing and self-doubt, she still greets jin's offer for help with warm politeness... and an audible smile, even if she continues to hide her image. ]

So long as you don't put any unnecessary risk to yourself...

video | un: lucina

[heritors]

Mother —! [ It's instinctive, worry and concern and everything else in between mixing into a knee-jerk reaction that has her flicker the feed on.

... ... Uh. ] Is there anything I can do to help?

still audio!

[winces]

[ her voice softens considerably here, warm and calm. purposefully so. ]

Lucina... you've done so much for me already. Knowing you're safe and well is help enough for me.

audio; username: julius

[viscontree]

Olivia, I need to speak with you immediately. ALASTAIR generously granted me a second opportunity to use healing magic. May I be of some assistance to you? [Yeah, he did mention losing his powers temporarily, but it's no longer an issue it seems. Thank god for that. ]

I originally had doubts at first...but seeing you do your best has renewed my spirit. We cannot give up now.

[winces]

[ amidst all this news has brought upon her, she cannot help but feel her heart stutter at this bit of news. to know that it was possible to regain lost powers from alastair... that was.. a relief.

wasn't it? ]

—Julius, that's. That's wonderful. Do you know what you're able to do?

video: L . L

[asscan]

[Laedo looks unusually pink, a bit singed around the edges. He's been away for a month fighting on the wing with a different team... but hearing Olivia on his comm-jewel feels a little bit like coming home. Therefore he grins affably, unaware of quite the depths of despair Audentes has been struggling through up to this point with the Deemers.]

I always told you you were a vital part of this assembly. Fill me in. I can help.

still audio

[winces]

[ he is certainly a sight for sore eyes, however different he may look due to his travels. but having known he'd been missing for a good portion of this, and thus all the grief wrapped around the deemers...

she unfortunately cannot take his kind words too close to heart.

nor does she have the strength to refute them. ]

...I admit I do not know the extent of everything. Th-There are files saved on the jewelry, I think. They may be better than just my perspective.

audio; un: ASCIIanything

[catphishing]

Is there anything anyone else can do?

[winces]

[ she has to actually take a moment to breathe a little, force the weight off her words when she responds. ]

Yes, of course. [ this much, she has to believe. ] Anyone can do something.

Do you have any skills you'd be willing to lend?

video; un: G.SLQHV

[twinpeak]

[ Like a few others, Dipper is among those that appear uneasy. ]

... Are you planning on doing this with all of them?

still audio

[winces]

[ she has to actually look away from his image. somehow, it is ten times harder to bear the disapproval of a child. ]

The ones who survive the extraction, you mean? [ because so very little do in the first place. patient zero — felix, she'd come to learn — had been the only one of four that had opened their eyes again. ]

I would try to.

audio | un: Princess (srd2 spoilers sorta)

[assent]

"They will not remember anything at all." Do you have any idea how that feels? [ For once, there's an actual strain to her voice. ] To wake up with no memory of where you have been or what you have done. Your achievements, your moments of grief or hapiness. To have very little idea of your past or your friends or family. Clearly you do not. This is not saving them unless there is proof that their memories will return, it is just... cruel.

Our memories shape us, they make us who we are. As do our connections with other people. If you strip that away from someone... are you not just a shell anyway? Living and breathing, but being unaware of anything else. We learn from our past, it is something that can change us into a better person, or maybe even worse--but it is still something that defines us.

I apologise if this was out of line to say, however... I cannot agree with this wholeheartedly.

[winces]

[ by now, olivia has had some time to calm. some time to step back, reassess, and consider her actions.

while she is regretful that what she once thought was meant to be such happy news, is now something that causes so many people such grief...

she cannot find it in herself to regret what she's done. if she had known all this effort would lead to permanent amnesia, would she still have done it...?

yes. probably. ]

...Yes, you're right. Our memories do shape us, and make us who we are. [ she won't argue that. she is sentimental to a fault, after all. ]

But that doesn't mean we cannot make new ones. That doesn't mean we shouldn't be allowed to. [ she thinks of robin, she thinks of haise. should they have died when they suddenly woke up, not remembering who they were, or where they came from? she is sure it must have been painful, and scary, and crippling. and maybe, for some, that is enough to not want to move forward.

but olivia isn't going to make that decision for them. amnesia is terrible, and painful, and maybe she is being a little cruel to subject someone to this but it is not a death sentence. it can't be. ]

If there's a possibility I can give someone that second chance to start again... I can't just sit on that.

[ she won't. ]

Thank you for telling me your experiences... I'm sorry you don't agree.

video; un: sakurakinomoto

[keystaff]

Ah! It's possible? Then.....I have healing, from ALASTAIR. So if you need help still. I'd like to do what I can!

[Of course she offers, never mind her own recovery from the hands of the Deemers. She wouldn't be asking for help like this if Olivia could handle it herself, Sakura figures. So she wants to help with this somehow.]

still audio

[winces]

[ she bites down on her lip, conflicted at the sight of such a young person responding. to lay such a burden on someone so young... can she truly do this? ]

It — It is a very difficult task... and there's no guarantee it will be successful.

[ suffice to say, it will be a lot of work, and a lot of death. sakura should understand what it is she's getting herself into. ]

[Voice | un: tsukuyo]

[sekimorinashi]

[ Well, there sure are some naysayers in this post. From her experience, life is always better. ]

That's incredible, Olivia.

[winces]

There's no guarantee it will work every time... [ in fact, she's almost positive it won't. ]

But I suppose it's something.

video; un: cuttlefishCuller

[fintastic]

I want to help! I don't know if my abilities will work but I will try!

[ She's almost positive this would be a better job for a Sylph of Mind, but she has to at least try... ]

still audio

[winces]

[ olivia's smile falters. thankfully she remains in audio form. ]

It... It won't be easy, you know. And it may not work out.

audio; kazbrekker

[steler]

So you're going to, what? Return their loved ones a message of hope followed and then saddle them with someone who won't remember them at all?

[although kaz speaks easily, he has thought about this quite a bit before answering. all of this stuff with the deemers, it's not the same was when they'd dealt with parem, but in another way it was. if they'd unilaterally decided that the grisha on parem weren't worth saving, they would've left nina for dead. but nina was also a special case. and he knew better to think that rules weren't without exceptions.

but kaz isn't afraid to be cold, and he's never been afraid to point out flaws. it's hardly politically correct, but that's not really part of his concern.]

What do you think those people you're "helping" really want?

[winces]

Until I'm told otherwise, I will always believe someone would rather choose a second chance at life than not. And... And if they decide that they don't want that, then they still have that freedom to make that choice.

[ she is getting better now, sorting her thoughts, remembering her conviction and why while this help may hurt, it is still help, it is still hope. ]

Amnesia is not a death sentence.

( audio | un: 10-65 )

[construing]

[ the fuck is wrong with these people?? ]

Thank goodness you were around.

[ and aren't listening, seriously, the fuck is wrong with this team? ]

What's the extent of the amnesia? Just personal memories or do they need to relearn basic tasks too?

[winces]

[ a small breath of relief, a literal breather. ]

Personal memories and skills seem to be the extent of it. He can function just fine, on his own... but he struggles with the guitar. According to his parents, he had been quite good at it, before.

audio | un: aqua

[keeper]

[ She thinks of Ventus, the days she and Terra spent at his bedside waiting for him to wake. He'd been brought to their Master near-comatose, eyes blank, personality vacant. (With a fractured 'heart', which is more or less what she sees here.)

Neither completely broken nor completely whole. ]

I'm afraid my magic can't undo such a wound [ would that she could ], or extract the Taraxa, but I'll help you however else I can.

[ She knows it's much too little to offer, but still there's a deep-rooted sense of obligation. ]

[winces]

[ despite still being on the audio function, olivia is eager to at least sound like she's smiling. it is a breath of fresh air to hear a familiar, friendly voice, at least. ]

Aqua... that's very kind of you to offer. Are you sure?

[ truthfully... knowing the other girl has healing abilities has always made her want to ask her to devote a little more time to it, considering how great the fighter to healer ratio is among their numbers. ]

audio; un: diclonius

[scarredhorns]

[Nyuu had been in a pretty delicate mental state ever since she woke up to find herself covered in the blood of Lucy's victims a few days ago, but she hadn't harmed herself again so far.

Still, she feels her heart sink at this news. It's good news, of course, but it had come too late for her. If only Lucy had known this when she was extracting the Taraxa... Would she have spared them then?]

That's... That's wonderful news, Olivia-san. I'm so glad.

[She tries to sound more happy than sad, but it's hard with the lump in her throat.]

[winces]

[ truthfully, after hearing all the others' opinions on the matter, olivia can't tell anymore if it is good news or not.

hearing nyuu now... she hesitates. ]

...Are you alright, Nyuu?