video; un: PERIDOT5XG

[slapfight]

Since we have our new marching orders, and are preparing to depart relatively soon, I feel as if I should go on record admitting my one weakness.

[she makes an agitated noise.] I'm not good at blending in.

[she holds up her hands, suddenly excited.]

But! But I have learned that the one thing that sets me apart is that I'm considered to be very funny. So by using my natural gift for comedy, I will surely keep the natives off guard while we plan out our strategies.

The problem is I don't have many jokes. The one about the chicken, while hilarious, will probably lose its charm after awhile, so in the name of preserving teamwork, I ask of you, my fellow Audentes, to give me, the great and lovable Peridot, your best jokes.

Comments

[slapfight]

[and then she finally... just explodes.]

IT'S NOT A COSTUME, IT'S MY BODY, YOU CLOD.

[feytality]

[Amazing that it took so long]

But... you're pointy! And green! And not like, with envy or anything!

[slapfight]

I am a Peridot. [she sounds like she's on the verge of hysterics.] This is the precise shape and coloration of my gem class and type.

So.. Basically... [and louder:] I am not human! That is why I'm green. Do you understand now?!

[feytality]

But isn't that a rock?

[wait]

Are you the Rock?!

[How has Peridot not murdered her already]

[slapfight]

[through gritted teeth] According to the average human, I, Peridot, am a "sentient rock."

[feytality]

.... Seriously?! Why didn't you just say so!?

[Cue Peridot reaching through the magitek to strangle her...]

That's seriously awesome!

[slapfight]

[the urge is there. THE URGE IS SO THERE.

but at least she's being complimented, so there's that.]

Wow thanks. I am... "awesome."

[feytality]

[Be strong, Peri]

How does it work? Do you transform into a giant robot form of a rock? Is the peridot on your head like.. your heart? Can you sell yourself if you're low on cash?

[slapfight]

No. To all of those things.

[she touches her gem awkwardly.] Uh... Except maybe the second one if my understanding of human biology is correct...

[feytality]

Oh, really? The heart pumps blood and stuff! What's that like, for gems?

[slapfight]

It makes my physical form and holds all the data about my existence?

[feytality]

Isn't that kinda like what a computer does...?

[slapfight]

That's also an overly simplistic way of looking at it, but... essentially yes.

[gemology is so hard to explain to humans.]

[feytality]

So you're like.... a super gem robot! That's really cool.

[slapfight]

[this thread in summary]

That's right. I'm cool.

[feytality]

You don't really need jokes! You can just show off your robot gem stuff!

[slapfight]

That would defeat the purpose of blending in...

[feytality]

.....

I guess you're right. Maybe the world isn't ready for awesome robogems.....

[What a tragedy]