text; un: shitpost king

[hedonistic]

sup nerds
sorry to interrupt everyone's doom and gloom party over here, but with the whole zombie apocalypse thing going down outside, there's about 90% less shit to actually do and i'm super fucking bored, so

let's play never have i ever

which, if ur one of the stone age people, goes like this:
u post something u have never done
other people reply
threadjacking is encouraged
if u ever did the thing u gotta post urself taking a sip of booze of ur choice
(or u can just go honor system i guess if u want, i'm not the boss of u)

if ur like a tiny baby or are a lame person who doesn't drink u can have water or soda instead
the challenge for u is to avoid peeing as long as possible

so i'll start us off

never have i ever....had an urge to chomp on human flesh (◡‿◡✿)





(no i'm kidding. i'm kidding, that's not the real one. u can put down ur torches and pitchforks lmao)



ok here's the real real one: never have i ever been on a roller coaster

Comments

[hedonistic]

oh my fucking god
that's so cute, what the hell
why does my world not have adorable fairies you can play video games with

[keystaff]

Fairies? Um, he's not a fairy. He's a Guardian. This is just what his disguise looks like. He's usually more. I guess like a lion with wings that breathes fire?

[hedonistic]

[kagari shuusei's jelly meter: rising]

that's even better

[keystaff]

It took a bit of adjusting to when he would sometimes transform at home, inside, when he'd talk to Yue-san.

But it worked out, since he was able to help defend me when things got a little out of hand from then on too.

[hedonistic]

shit who's yue??

[if kero is a winged firebreathing lion then this yue is probably something even cooler, like a DRAGON or something]

i'm so mad jealous that you're from a world where this kind of thing is totally normal

[BE EXCITED ABOUT THIS LIKE HE IS]

[keystaff]

He's the other Guardian. Sort of -- um. Kero-chan is under the power of the sun, right? And Yue-san is under the power of the moon. He looks more human,
besides the wings, at least.

But it isn't really normal, exactly. I tried to keep it all a secret back home.

i couldn't resist the meta joke

[hedonistic]

[noooo, more human-looking is boring. he's less interested in this yue now.]



.........so basically you're saying you're a shoujo manga protagonist

Fourth wall what fourth wall she already dealt with Kurogane and Fai.

[keystaff]

Eh? I'm not sure I'd say that?

I mean, Tomoyo-chan might have liked that with how she makes my outfits and films me a lot but.

omg

[hedonistic]

uh
films you what

[is...is this something he should be Concerned about]

[keystaff]

Um, with my magic? And sometimes when she watches me cheerleading and stuff after school. Kero-chan enjoys it at least since he likes watching himself 'being cool' helping me capture the cards.

[hedonistic]

okay slow down
what cards, what magic
who's tomoyo and why does she put you in outfits and film you in them

[keystaff]

There was this book I found in the basement, that had Kero-chan and the Clow Cards he was supposed to be guarding. Only, when I accidentally activated Windy, Windy kind of blew the others away so I had to capture them again. With Kero-chan's help.

Tomoyo-chan is my best friend in my class at school! She likes making me special outfits when I'd go capture another card, and film it.

[hedonistic]

[well that's...less skeevy than he thought ....at least.....]

so these cards are like, sentient
any reason they don't just come back if you call for them or something??

[keystaff]

It's not that simple. They wanted to test me. That I had to prove myself to them to earn their power.
And then prove myself to Yue-san for him to accept me as the new Mistress.

[hedonistic]

[u h h h

this yue guy sounds like a guy with a lolicon fetish tbqh]

mistress
you uh
wanna explain that one a little more

[keystaff]

I guess they call me that instead of being the Master of the cards? Since I'm a girl? I know previously there was Clow-san, but...he passed away a long time ago until I found his book with the cards in it that Kero-chan was guarding.

[hedonistic]

oh

[that makes sense...he supposes...kind of still reserving judgment tho]

so what do you have to do do ~prove yourself~

[keystaff]

That -- well. Yue-san wanted me to use the cards to defeat him. But I -- I couldn't. Because of who Yue-san really was. I knew him as Yukito-san for years before I found out about Yue-san. So I didn't want to fight him. I said I wanted to be his friend.

If that hadn't worked out, everyone who had encountered one of the cards would have forgotten the person they love the most. About the cards.
I would have....

[hedonistic]

welp
good thing the power of friendship worked out i g

[keystaff]

It did! Yes. I'm glad I was able to get through to Yue-san.

[hedonistic]

if you already proved yourself or whatever tho why do you still need to catch the rest of the cards
isn't there some kind of magical recall spell

[keystaff]

I met Yue-san after I'd captured all the cards. He then had to judge if I was worthy. It was only after that I met Eriol-kun who helped me change them to work under my own magic.

But if I had failed, I'd have forgotten all about the cards. That I had magic at all. I'd forget about....about Syaoran-kun.

[hedonistic]

so you had to prove yourself to the cards and then to this yue guy and THEN to an eriol?

that seems pointlessly complicated
couldn't there have been some kind of idk chosen one test ritual or something

who's syaoran

[keystaff]

Well, it's..complicated. Eriol-kun knew I wouldn't use the cards without reason so he sort of had to push me to change the cards to work under my magic instead of Clow-san's.

And Syaoran-kun is my. um. my boyfriend. He helped with the cards back home when he moved to Tomoeda from Hong Kong.

[hedonistic]

[ . . . ]

ok yeah wow your life is REALLY shoujo

[he hasn't yet met the character from his favorite shonen manga that he's going to in a few months, but after he does, he's going to reevaluate this conversation. the multiverse is weird.]