text; un: shitpost king

[hedonistic]

ok listen up, this is actually legitimately important

if this is your first time getting locked up like this, you need to understand one main thing going forward: our lives are less than worthless to these people. every second we're still breathing is a second more than they needed to give us.

i can't promise that we're going to be okay. i don't know if ALASTAIR gives enough of a shit to come for us. but even though i'm not gonna be the guy who has a lot of pretty words to say to keep hope alive or whatever, i do know a few things about staying safe in here. surviving, if this is for the long haul

1) don't make a fuss or be a nuisance to the guards. don't draw attention. the more forgettable you are, the better off you'll be

2) try to avoid using your jewel comms as much as you can. if they realize we're communicating through these, they'll be confiscated

3) DON'T TRY TO BE A HERO. this is the most important point here so i'm gonna repeat it, DO NOT TRY TO BE A FUCKING HERO.

we're not in a fucking action movie, trying to escape or break everyone out will get you in deep ass shit, maybe even made an example out of. don't fucking do it.

Comments

[hedonistic]

lucky us

[ofobedience]

Lucky us, indeed.

-> private

[hedonistic]

hahaha yeah
i should've taken that hint back in woodhurst
but for some insane reason i assumed they might think i know what i'm talking about here! 8D

[Which is his main mistake, he realizes. You can only be useful on this team if you think the "right" way, which is stupid--even in Japan, they made use of the brains of people like him to solve problems the right thinkers couldn't--but how Audentes operates.

He should've just stuck to his "pointless games."]

[hedonistic]

[Neither do I ask for reciprocation. Some part of Kagari wants to reach forward, grab Ninurrta by the goddamn collar, and shake him. Who the hell just offers up something like that and demands you take it without even the possibility that it would be returned. And why? Kagari wasn't his friend. They didn't even share the kinship of common experiences, a mutual unspoken understanding of being fucked up like the Enforcers did back in Japan.

What do you want from me?, he'd like to ask, but he realizes with an almost sickening clarity that the answer would be nothing, or effectively nothing, and he's struggling with his temper in this moment as it is.]

Look, I know you're trying real hard to convince yourself that I'm a Good Person so doing this isn't completely stupid, but you're really just wasting your time.

[He sighs, flopping back on the bed and pointedly staring at the tiles to avoid looking at his cellmate directly.]

But hey, it's not like I can stop you. So whatever.

sob i have no idea how a closed economy actually works orz but i Tried

[hedonistic]

¯\_(ツ)_/¯
our economy's been closed up tight just about as long
we're self-sufficient so shit costs more or less what the government wants it to cost

[shrug????? there's a whole stress care industry that's probably tied in with the ministry of welfare, too. people are so paranoid about their psycho-passes they'll pay anything to keep them clear. It probably offsets the costs associated with maintaining the facilities, he imagines.

Or maybe that's just his bitterness talking.]

anyway yeah i did
not until i was an adult, though
can you imagine the PR nightmare otherwise? lmao

[neveroutwrenched]

okay, yeah. well you've got me on the 'magic' part

it sounds like we just need to be more creative

[hedonistic]

ok then you go ahead and come up with your creative ways to die
have fun!!

[hedonistic]

shit man, they dragged the 0s in here too

it's not gonna be about murder

[Kagari might not be educated in criminal profiling or psychology like Kogami is or have experience with the old system of law enforcement like Masaoka, but he's been working cases with the CID for almost two years, and he's perceptive. Everyone from Audentes got picked up, even the ones that were on distraction duty at the Gala. The only way anyone could know why they were there would be if George sold them out, and if he did, why would he be in there with them?

"Conspiracy to commit grand theft" his ass. Somebody had a grudge against either ALASTAIR at large, or against their team in particular.]

this shit is gonna be personal, dude
somebody KNOWS we're ALASTAIR, and wants to get rid of us
or use us somehow, idk

[trueborn]

Kagari. Your second attempt at belittling the worth of my word is noted.

[ He knows his name only because of roll call. There had never been an opportunity before the heist or their incarceration to learn it, and he speaks it now. Sharp. Authoritative, if only because he wants this young man's direct attention. Don't look away from him, as though you've said all that needs to be said! ]

Don't assume you know my motives, or my mind. You're not an idiot, and you're not blind.

[ He points. From Kagari's forehead, to his own. To the symbols upon them. ]

There's little need to continue to view yourself as the only pariah among us.

[keystaff]

If they don't listen, that's not your fault though! You did try!

I mean, you can't control what other people do, right?

[hedonistic]

[At least it's not "Shuusei." He might have had half a mind to actually try to clock Ninurrta then.

Instead, there's just a soft cackling sound from Kagari, his shoulders gently shaking in mirth. He sits back upright, finally, leaning up against the cell wall, legs crossed. There's an ugliness to the smirk he wears.]

Man, you really are something, Ninu-san. Can I call you that? I'm gonna call you that.

[Mostly because he might have a little difficulty with the last syllable, and it'd take away from what he has to say.]

A pariah, hah. Are you kidding me? You're perfect for this team.

[Despite the bitterness to that comment, it's not entirely derisive. Sure, he can't stand some of the people in Audentes, the ones that shove their moral superiority in everyone's face whenever they disagree with anyone. He finds the group as a whole frustrating and unrealistic. But it makes sense in an awful sort of way. It's fitting. Sybil told him a long time ago that he didn't belong with society, amongst the good wholesome citizens of Japan, and then he fell through a rift and proved it by being the nail that sticks up in a team full of do-gooders and bleeding hearts.]

I know your type. You're just like a girl I know back home. All kind and gentle and sweet, full of all this hope about the good you want to do for the universe.

[And despite his poorly-concealed anger, there's a thread of affection there, too. For all his huffing and puffing, he misses Akane more than he would ever admit.]

I bet you jumped at the thought of going around saving timelines and universes. Being useful, making a difference. Maybe even finding the reason why you were brought into existence, huh? Come on, tell me I'm wrong.

[dbag]

Not... really. Kinda seems like the whole dystopian society thing is bad PR on its own.

Sooo, you just fell in a rift in jail and now you're back in jail again? That is some major luck.

[hedonistic]

haha why would it be
the system's great if you're healthy and normal
i mean it's shit but that doesn't mean it doesn't work

[They're the only country on their side of the world not at war, after all. Results are results; nobody cares about the finer details.]

well, mostly
i have that job for a reason, after all
but people don't like to think about that part

[hedonistic]

would that make them any less dead, in the end?

[neveroutwrenched]

as opposed to....waiting for a rescue that might not even happen? im no saying we have to be RECKLESS but im not feeling too confident about rescue...

[skelepun]

guess i'm outta luck. or does this mean i'm in prime position to be a hero?

if that's the case, i'm not the only one outta luck.

[keystaff]

No....I guess it wouldn't.

[Regardless of intentions. The best intentions couldn't bring someone back, could it? Not as far as Sakura knew. Beyond some science or magic she has no clue on. Beyond the likes of Clow and his reincarnations, and she still isn't sure how that happened.]

[hedonistic]

[He sighs. Because it's Sakura, and because there's no reason to be needlessly cruel to a kid, much as he doesn't believe in sugarcoating, he offers:]

but maybe there'll be less of them than there would've been otherwise i guess

[hedonistic]

awww what's this
sounds like ur missing a shoujo sparkle or two there, friendo

[It's a dumb joke, a callback to an old conversation, but...it's easier this way. He doesn't have to tackle the implication behind Sans' words head-on like this, can carefully sidestep them instead.]

nah though the heroing is an across-the-board sort of bad idea
just, u kno, maybe less dire in the consequences department if you're already dead and all

[hedonistic]

man
idk where you guys get the idea that i'm holding out for that shit
spoiler alert: i'm not
ngl i'm not sure what part of tips for SURVIVING in here has somehow gone over everybody's heads but i also don't really care that much so
whatever

[He kind of cares. But his fuck-giving ability diminishes with each person that argues with him about this.]

sorry for the delay!!! i got weirdly stuck on this tag

[hedonistic]

oh no i'm the one who should apologize
i didn't realize warning people not to do anything fucking stupid would be so deeply offensive!!!!
my mistake, absolutely
being realistic about our prospects for actually getting out of this dump was clearly a grave miscalculation on my part

however can i make it up to you, anonymous stranger
maybe i can start by practicing how to survive without breathing, really get my head in the game

[hedonistic]

don't be stupid
obviously i'd rather leave
i'd also rather be a firebreathing dragonkin with psychic powers and laser vision than a regular boring human, but some things just aren't going to happen
this whole team needs a serious reality check

[dbag]

So what, nobody cares? There's not like any activist groups protesting for... bad-brain rights?

[neveroutwrenched]

surviving until what? I don't know about you, but I don't wanna spend the rest of my life in here

[fourscores]

Maybe they'll surprise you. Or maybe they'll just get lucky and whatever breakout plan they come up with actually works.