text; un: shitpost king

[hedonistic]

ok listen up, this is actually legitimately important

if this is your first time getting locked up like this, you need to understand one main thing going forward: our lives are less than worthless to these people. every second we're still breathing is a second more than they needed to give us.

i can't promise that we're going to be okay. i don't know if ALASTAIR gives enough of a shit to come for us. but even though i'm not gonna be the guy who has a lot of pretty words to say to keep hope alive or whatever, i do know a few things about staying safe in here. surviving, if this is for the long haul

1) don't make a fuss or be a nuisance to the guards. don't draw attention. the more forgettable you are, the better off you'll be

2) try to avoid using your jewel comms as much as you can. if they realize we're communicating through these, they'll be confiscated

3) DON'T TRY TO BE A HERO. this is the most important point here so i'm gonna repeat it, DO NOT TRY TO BE A FUCKING HERO.

we're not in a fucking action movie, trying to escape or break everyone out will get you in deep ass shit, maybe even made an example out of. don't fucking do it.

Comments

[digiorno]

it's true. guards don't give a shit even in the best of prisons.

if you're going to use the comms use them wisely, because they're a good communication tool and less obvious than congregating in person, so we don't want to lose them.

safety is paramount. don't be a hero. have each other's backs, obviously, although that hopefully won't be hard.

[hedonistic]

if we're not careful, they could start separating us into entirely different cellblocks, too, and then we'd have no way to stay in contact at all

[neveroutwrenched]

spoken like someone who's never broken out of a prison before

[hedonistic]

haha cute
but unless you've got magic space jail under your belt i think we're a different flavor of screwed

text; un: cardmaster

[fateality]

How many prisons you've broken out of, wile?

[hedonistic]

[Seriously? Seriously?]

none, because i'm not an idiot

text■ un: virtuoso

[fourscores]

Try to be a hero? Do people really do that?

[hedonistic]

have you SEEN this team?

[He's already got people arguing with him about it.]

text; user name: sakurakinomoto

[keystaff]

I've never been. Um, in prison I mean. But ALASTAIR must know, right? Or, they'll find out. I still have my staff, since it wasn't activated when they brought us here but they took my cards away.

I just hope we all stay safe in the meantime, while we figure this out.
While ALASTAIR figure this. At least we still all have our comms, right?

[hedonistic]

i'm guessing lloyd will figure it out once we don't report back in from this mission, but it's kind of a tossup on whether they'll send backup or not

i mean, we're all space refugees they fished out from the cracks in the multiverse, it's not like we're exactly invaluable to their cause
it might just not be worth their while to save us

[He doesn't mean to sound harsh; he honestly likes Sakura a lot. But there's no point sugarcoating the situation, he thinks. It'll only make survival here more difficult.]

text; un: Taer

[littlestguano]

You're right, it is definitely a much better idea to sit around like sheep waiting to be slaughtered and hope someone saves us. Good thinking.

[hedonistic]

man, you people are all so goddamn arrogant
sometimes it really is a choice between getting your ass killed immediately and someday in the undefined future
sometimes there isn't a third fucking option!

[He's starting to wonder why he even bothered trying, honestly. Why should he care if anyone else gets themselves killed? He should just let the idiots do whatever they want.

...and yet, he finds himself too angry to stop.]

have you even bothered looking outside? we're in outer fucking space

there's LITERALLY nowhere to go, even if we could get out
to get out of this mess on our own we would have to TAKE OVER THE SHIP and if you think somehow WE'RE special enough to make that happen when there's 25 other cellblocks full of prisoners who've been here much longer, then i don't know what the fuck to tell you

text, un: uchiha

[beginanew]

I hope people listen to you. I worry about someone who might try to be a hero.

[hedonistic]

well, it looks like you're going to find out soon enough!!!!!

text; un: swan

[sheriffing]

Your plan is for us to stay in here until someone saves us?

That never works.

[hedonistic]

my plan is not to be stupid!!!

but you know what, nevermind! NEVER FUCKING MIND, I OFFICIALLY WITHDRAW MY ADVICE
i mean, sure, i spent 15 years in a facility where i could be gassed to death at any fucking time but hey, what the fuck do i know, right?

[ofobedience]

So you're suggesting we sit in our hands and behave ourselves and hope ALASTAIR finds us useful enough to come for us? Honestly, I'm a little surprised.

[Not that he necessarily disagrees. Despite his propensity for violence, he's never tried to escape his own captivity. Why start now?]

[hedonistic]

yeah. i'm a tricksy motherfucker like that

[He's so Done with this already tbh, he regrets ever bothering to post it.]

throw your life away being stupid or don't,
i couldn't give less of a fuck anymore

action ( bc cellmates!! ).

[trueborn]

[ -- you bet he can hear the noises that kagari is making, especially after checking the network for any news from the other audentes members and seeing

this??? ] It's going to be okay.

[ he might be misinterpreting those sounds..... oh well! ]

I won't let anything bad happen to you. We'll find a way out of this.

NINU ;A;

[hedonistic]

[He hears the words, but they don't really register at first; the absurdity of them passing through his ears as if someone had just told him 2+2 actually equals 5.

It's going to be okay. I won't let anything bad happen to you.

There's a time-delay, of sorts, processing that. The anger is still white-hot in his veins, his frustration and bitterness and impatience with a team that never seems to want to face difficult realities, that thinks they can fix everything in the multiverse as long as they want it bad enough. He doesn't hear Ninurrta, at first. Not really.

And then they rush in and over him suddenly, like the oncoming tide, and --

For an instant his lungs are empty. Then...

What was before faint huffs of derisive chuckles with only the tinge of mania to them turns into full-blown laughter, ugly and sharp like broken glass, dissonant and wild. A mad hyena's guffaw.

His eyes don't hold the child's wonder Ninurrta saw back at the gala. No, something far less innocent has replaced them, something damaged. Something that's died a hundred deaths and had to keep on living anyway. How ironic, that the first person to ever say those words to him would be a literal stranger? The words he most longed to hear 17 years ago, when his parents were handing him over to officials not unlike these...looking on with sad, drawn faces, mourning for their only child rather than dare fighting for him.

I won't let anything bad happen to you. It rings in his ears. This stupid kid, acting like he'd throw away his life for someone he doesn't even know. What a fucking joke.]

What'd I just say about being a goddamn hero?

TEXT | un: huntsman

[dishearten]

i agree.

you'll be no more free if you die trying to escape than you are incarcerated.

( Graham coming in like a real ray of sunshine... thanks graham. )

[hedonistic]

oh hey, this team does have some people with common sense after all
it's a goddamn miracle

text; un: demon cyborg

[scrap_metal]

[ an advice coming from someone living this life ]

Noted. It's a sound advice for the situation we're in.

[ he's not promising he's going to follow it, tho. ]

[hedonistic]

OR!!! i'm just a huge coward who has no idea what he's talking about (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
50/50 odds

[Someone is Very Frustrated about how this post has been going so far. He's forgotten about Genos being Mr. Literal, unfortunately. Oops.]

text | un: RHY5-W1NZ

[dbag]

You've been in jail before???

[hedonistic]

try: my entire life (◡‿◡✿)

text; un: hemlock (private)

[unholey]

[Fugo's honestly not interested in debating the merits of lying low vs. planning an immediate escape plan. He thinks it's stupid to try and make a break for it when they know so little about where they are and how the hell the wardens of this ship even managed to pick them up--but he also knows that he isn't mentally equipped for playing the long game here.

So. Rather than addressing that, after reading the way Kagari's responses have taken an increasingly hysterical edge, he sends a private message of a different sort.]

Shredding paper helps. When you're pissed and it's got nowhere to go, because you have to keep quiet.

[hedonistic]

[ur the real mvp fugo....kagari doesn't even get defensive, is surprisingly lacking in snark when he simply responds:]

do you have paper?
pretty sure i'd get my ass handed to me if i ruined their stupid books

text; un: steelsamayarai

[feytality]

[it's kinda frustrating to see him go off on the network again, (though at least this time it isn't about idealists are terrible forever.... sort of) but she can tell he's scared and he's trying to help, (and this all comes from experience) so she can push aside her own feelings]

hey kagari

wanna hang out?

[hedonistic]

[It's perhaps a testament to how rattled he is by the situation that he doesn't immediately jump on the offer.]

hang out?

[It's repeated, dumbly, as though the translation function has temporarily failed and he can't understand what she's saying.]

uh sure i guess
what did you want to do?

[He doesn't think it's safe to play games or watch movies on the magitek, and his other hobbies are generally inaccessible here. And what other reason was there to hang out with him, unless they were doing something fun?]

text; un: anonymous

[skelepun]

[This is an important post, with important things to say, but Sans is more bored than usual, and this guy's particular outlook on life always did manage to give him something to do for a few hours.]

does all this apply if we've already stopped breathing?

[hedonistic]

[This guy. Well...Kagari's not particularly in a lighthearted mood, especially at this point, but. He likes Sans well enough, so he'll play along.]

nope
lungs-only advice here