text | UN: A$HMON3Y

[moneyballer]

ay yo ladieeeeez 😜 hay hay hAY hayyyyyy ✋✋✋ if any of u girly gals need a STUDMUFFIN ✔️✔️✔️✔️ 2 help sell the whole baws asssz upper class B I A T C H than g thang thaaaaang 💁 dis boi got an 🍑 dat won't quit and a lotta lurve ❤️❤️❤️ 4 his new teamies so holla atcho homie if u need a little man 🍭 hangin around while u strut ur stuff

*and PS NO 🐵 bidness, i'm taken, ok? yee thnk u

skeet skeet

Comments

[refashioned]

How old are we talking? We might want to make sure he carries a warning sign.

[digiorno]

Not old enough to be the product of an entirely bygone era, but old enough to know better.

His username used to be the warning sign, but he changed it.

[refashioned]

And that was...?

MORE YELLING; VOICE

[moneyballer]

DON'T-

voice;

[refashioned]

Wow. That's ... impressive. With a healthy helping of wishful thinking.

[digiorno]

[. . . The nice thing to do here would be keep this horrible secret a secret. But. It's really funny?]

i can b ur daddy

was the username.

[moneyballer]

why r u???????????

[if there was a text version of whispering under his breath:]

u'll pay 4 this

[digiorno]

WORTH IT

[moneyballer]

one day,,,,,,,,

i will get u

[digiorno]

What are you even going to do to me, I'm bulletproof.

[lyING]

[refashioned]

No one ever took him up on the offer, right?

[moneyballer]

i'm not single????

r e a d the txt

[refashioned]

I'm very concerned that this is an if then statement.

[digiorno]

Not because of the username.

. . . At least I'm pretty sure not because of the username.

[refashioned]

That is what he seems to be implying.

[digiorno]

Now I'm just concerned and upset and might need to have an intervention.

[refashioned]

Do you happen to know the ... lucky? person he's dating?

[digiorno]

I do. Now I worry I know too much about him.

[jin come here and answer for your sins]

They're shockingly well-adjusted together, it's just that when they're not supervising each other things like this happen.

[refashioned]

Is their relationship an open secret? I might be new, but I have to know all the details.

[digiorno]

I don't think so, no. And of course that's your right. I can't tell you all the details due to some of them being very embarrassing to the parties involved [untrue he will tell all just not in public] but it's Jin. You've probably seen him. Or heard him. He's tall and good-looking and nine times out of ten has his foot in his mouth.

[refashioned]

We've met. He was handling his tact rather well that day. He arranged a very necessary excursion to the Commoner's District.

Something tells me he has to get his boy in line to take things seriously.

[digiorno]

Oh good job, Jin. Well done.

They have to get each other in line. They might cancel each other out, I'm not really sure how that works. They're both learning because even temporally displaced interdimensional love changes lives, but at the same time sometimes there are still peach butt emoji posts.

[refashioned]

I'm assuming that Ashmoney here is a little more toned down in person?

[digiorno]

For the most part. He can be really thoughtful, honestly, which is probably why he changed his username.

To A$HMON3Y.

Baby steps.

[refashioned]

A$HMON3Y is VERY tame. Trust me.

And still comes with enough warning signs for those who are aware and not ready to deal with the resident fratboy of the team.