text, @TARANTO

[heavyhitter]

ok guys listen i got something i've been thinking about, no one's been able to answer it for me yet
check it out: deer dildos
???
do they use them? it doesn't have to be dildos anything sexy in general, that counts. i'm not buying there's any sentient sexually reproducing species out there that hasn't invented sex toys, so what do deer use. does it have to do with antlers?? i haven't put much thought into deer sex so i'm not working on much here, just tossing out ideas. lemme know, thanks



oh wait one more thing, i really wanna get off this island. i've seen everything and it's boring. these guys suck at technology right? and swimming. oh my god they're so pathetically useless

but WE are way better at both those things! so here's my proposal: we team up and use our evolved smarts and build a floating litter, or popemobile, or something, and get me over to the next island. good, right?? i think we can do it! we got science grandpa AND nerd granduncle running around here, and probably half a dozen other nerds i haven't dug up yet. we can do this. i believe in us. if there's any parties going on on the other islands, let's get me to them.

Comments

happybirthday @ text

[adoube]

You're n o t allowed near the 'cute' deer people anymore (╬ Ò ‸ Ó) (・｀ヘ´・；)

[heavyhitter]

listen that's fine by me just get me off this island, that's the main point here

[adoube]

No.

We are a crew. We must all be very bored t o g e t h e r .

[heavyhitter]

hell no i didn't sign up for that! i don't deserve group boredom

[adoube]

You will not be part of the group. You cannot be trusted near the 'cute' deer.

You will be bored with the crew. But at a distance from the crew.

[heavyhitter]

oh my god chill out about the deer i'm not swinging that way

[adoube]

Scary-scary. You brought them up.

[heavyhitter]

perfectly healthy curiosity

[adoube]

If you are that bored............. do something useful like making the deers smile... or Luciola... one of them!! They both need socializing.

[heavyhitter]

does luciola ever smile, is that possible

1/2

[adoube]

Of course he smiles! He's smiling all the time!!

[adoube]

........you just can't see it.........

[heavyhitter]

oh yeah invisible smiles makes sense
what's his favorite kind of joke

[adoube]

nononono no

He smiles best when you give him tasty food!

[heavyhitter]

aw that's cute
what's his favorite kind

[adoube]

You can feed him and find out.........

[heavyhitter]

how does he take to seaweed

[adoube]

Don't be unkind.

[heavyhitter]

that's not unkind! people like seaweed, that's a thing

it's also super easy to get ahold of on an island

[adoube]

He's had too much 'sea' lately.

[heavyhitter]

oh yeah ok that's fair

what aabbbouuuuut creampuffs
our deer friends do a hell of a creampuff

[adoube]

............are you going to ask me about every single food that goes through your h e a d ?

[heavyhitter]

yeah that's basically the plan
i'm asking about deer dildos here i'm clearly not real busy

[adoube]

Are you "lonely"?

[heavyhitter]

i don't even know what that word means