text, @TARANTO

[heavyhitter]

ok guys listen i got something i've been thinking about, no one's been able to answer it for me yet
check it out: deer dildos
???
do they use them? it doesn't have to be dildos anything sexy in general, that counts. i'm not buying there's any sentient sexually reproducing species out there that hasn't invented sex toys, so what do deer use. does it have to do with antlers?? i haven't put much thought into deer sex so i'm not working on much here, just tossing out ideas. lemme know, thanks



oh wait one more thing, i really wanna get off this island. i've seen everything and it's boring. these guys suck at technology right? and swimming. oh my god they're so pathetically useless

but WE are way better at both those things! so here's my proposal: we team up and use our evolved smarts and build a floating litter, or popemobile, or something, and get me over to the next island. good, right?? i think we can do it! we got science grandpa AND nerd granduncle running around here, and probably half a dozen other nerds i haven't dug up yet. we can do this. i believe in us. if there's any parties going on on the other islands, let's get me to them.

Comments

[heavyhitter]

what the fuck is dragon language. english??? what has english ever done to deserve a name like that

[wardance]

dragons are better than engls

[heavyhitter]

i'm losing track of this conversation so fucking fast

[wardance]

me too
different topic

[heavyhitter]

ok swimming abilities and can you carry me on your shoulders as you swim: go

[wardance]

I can.

[heavyhitter]

wtf
how

[wardance]

OK
not literally swim
but I can go on the surface if its calm

[heavyhitter]

oh my god don't tell me you freeze water too
what is with all these weird ass powers

audio; because texting is too hard on phone lol ;(

[wardance]

—Someone here can freeze the sea water? No kidding, that's crazy stuff!
I can't do anything like that, though.

[heavyhitter]

ok so what's your trick

[wardance]

Walking on it.

[heavyhitter]

god what is WITH the powers around here
still though i gotta see that

[wardance]

Not normal in your world? Any... "powers", I mean.

-text- un: saber

[invisiblade]

[whoa whoa hold the phone enchanted jewelry.]

Excuse me. When you say "engls" to whom exactly are you referring??

[don't say English if you know what's good for you.]

[wardance]

the engl in english.

whatever it is.

[ welp ]

[invisiblade]

[?????? ??????]

Do you mean to imply that the English are somehow lesser by comparison!?

[just say NO. MASA.]

[wardance]

no

[ Never did he expect a conversation over deer sex to end up so controversial and dangerous as it has today. ]

[invisiblade]

Good.

[in that case, Masa may just escape this conversation with his life intact.]

I would not tolerate baseless slander against my people.

[wardance]

I would never do a thing like that.
dragons are better than everyone.

[invisiblade]

[Er--]

I suppose everyone is entitled to their opinion... no matter how strange.

To say they are "better than everyone" is a bit of a stretch, though.

[wardance]

You said 'my people'. Are you a ruler? It sounds too stressed by you to be a simple patriot-- your unwillingness to tolerate, I mean.

[invisiblade]

One need not be a ruler to take offense from such a statement when referring to their fellow countrymen.

Would you not be offended if someone were to speak as ill of you and your kind?

[wardance]

What if dragons and engls are actually one and the same? Aren't some of your kings titled or referred by 'pendragon'?

[invisiblade]

[ah... what are the chances???]

Yes, but they were not actual dragons.

[uh, most of them, anyway.]