text, @TARANTO

[heavyhitter]

ok guys listen i got something i've been thinking about, no one's been able to answer it for me yet
check it out: deer dildos
???
do they use them? it doesn't have to be dildos anything sexy in general, that counts. i'm not buying there's any sentient sexually reproducing species out there that hasn't invented sex toys, so what do deer use. does it have to do with antlers?? i haven't put much thought into deer sex so i'm not working on much here, just tossing out ideas. lemme know, thanks



oh wait one more thing, i really wanna get off this island. i've seen everything and it's boring. these guys suck at technology right? and swimming. oh my god they're so pathetically useless

but WE are way better at both those things! so here's my proposal: we team up and use our evolved smarts and build a floating litter, or popemobile, or something, and get me over to the next island. good, right?? i think we can do it! we got science grandpa AND nerd granduncle running around here, and probably half a dozen other nerds i haven't dug up yet. we can do this. i believe in us. if there's any parties going on on the other islands, let's get me to them.

Comments

[ex_monologuing117]

I do wonder why people feel the deer are being treated cruelly in your curiosity, but people being upset about anything is always a mystery to me.

Want from it? What do most demon-worshippers want? To be killed by it and have the rest of the world be devoured.

[heavyhitter]

[ wow, she likes this guy already. he Gets It. ]

Oh, yeah, I guess that does sound right. That's what I'd be going for. Especially if this is one of those party-demons, where first they give you the ultimate bachelor party, then the rest is all payment for it.

[ex_monologuing117]

I remember someone else who desired the same.

[ a beat. ]

Could it be that you're actually lonely?

[heavyhitter]

[ ok wow why do people keep suggesting that, that's borderline offensive ]

There's a hell of a conclusion to draw. Maybe I'm just sober, and it's an issue, ever think of that?

[ex_monologuing117]

No.

If I did, I would have mentioned it. Furthermore, the desire to become a drunkard is also a telling sign, is it not, young miss?

[heavyhitter]

Yeah, it's a telling sign that I live an exciting life filled with interesting people and dumb ideas.

[ex_monologuing117]

As you say, young miss.

[ will return to maintaining his lane. ]

In any case, has anyone offered to assist in your leaving this island?

[heavyhitter]

A couple, maybe. [ several, but there's no harm in finding out more people's capabilities. ] Why, you got something in mind?

[ex_monologuing117]

I do.

How are you about meeting a goddess?

[heavyhitter]

I got top notch manners [ clearly ] and can do a mean saying grace, I'm ready.

[ex_monologuing117]

Then to save these deer and allow them to remake their dildos [ heh ], we should see how things are with the goddess herself. At her volcano.

[heavyhitter]

And you can get us there. [ she sounds doubtful. ] How?

[ex_monologuing117]

Me?

[ Heh. ]

I asked after your connections with the hope that they could get us there. Or at the very least, drop me off. I do not mind if you leave me there as there may be something of worth on a desolate island. [ At the very least, he won't have to worry too much about an eruption. ]

[heavyhitter]

Oh, I see, you wanna piggyback off my genius. Guess I can't blame you.

[ex_monologuing117]

More like I am piggybacking off of your name.

[ If he makes it too much public knowledge of what he wants to do, those that know him may attempt to stop him, after all. ]

But we shall call it the same for ego's sake.

[heavyhitter]

Works for me.

I got a couple good bites that can get us there. One of 'em even involves getting sparkly, I think I'm pretty in favor of that one.

[ex_monologuing117]

Whatever shall do the job.

Thank you, young miss, for assisting me in my selfishness.

[heavyhitter]

Hold up, did I say this was outta the goodness of my heart? You might owe me.

[ex_monologuing117]

Then I owe you.

But you would still helping me with my selfishness.

[heavyhitter]

I mean, as long as we're clear.

I'll be in touch when I got it arranged, sound good?

[ex_monologuing117]

No one should offer anything without expecting something in return. If they do, they'll only find their kindness constantly trampled.

And so that works well for me, young miss. I am Matsunaga Hisahide, or Owl. [ look at him being a weeabo and saying his name non-western style for once. ] I look forward to the trip.

[heavyhitter]

Owl, holy shit, that's cute. [ and she'll probably even remember it! ] I'm Ramir. Catch you in a bit, Owl.

[ex_monologuing117]

Some would not agree. [ and he isn't so much of a tryhard edgelord to care if people find him cute. ]

Young miss. [ feel the slight head tip in his farewell as he disconnects. ]