VIDEO | un: huntsman

[dishearten]

( this post has been a long time coming. he's needed time to digest the news of the fate of the deemer, and that's even without a heart. it's uncomfortable to be faced with a legion of those that suffered as he had, only worse. by all intents and appearances, there was nothing left of them now.

does that make him lucky? that a part of him still remains, however dismantled from being controlled for decades?

lucky or not, it gives him perspective. a lot of perspective. and for better or worse, he feels the need to share it, in the hopes the rest of the team might understand a little better. )

By now I'm sure all of us know the condition of the Demeers. That they are being manipulated and controlled by a force outside themselves. All information we have indicates that there is nothing left to them after the Taxara infiltrate, their personality wiped and their body lost as a vessel for the means of another.

( he grimaces, unable to quite look the team in the eye as he continues. )

I hope that most of you do not know what it feels like, to not be in control of yourself. It is not a feeling I'd wish on anyone, because I've lived it. I was enslaved for longer than I lived freely. When I was young and foolish— ( some of Audentes can remember that man, thanks to the time shenanigans back in Oska. the Huntsman, full of heart, but full of anger too. ) —I made a promise I ultimately refused to keep. And I paid for it, when an evil queen stole my heart and used it to control me.

( he's outing himself, as the man Sieglinde is trying to help. Graham himself is starting to realize that is too much weight for her to carry; he'll have to broaden his search. but not now, not when there's more important tasks at hand. )

She made me steal. She made me hurt. She made me kill. She made me... do whatever would please her. And I could not resist, nor escape, though it didn't stop me from trying. I have been in the place of these people, for longer than most of you have lived. If it is true, that there's nothing of them left after these creatures took them over, then they are lucky to not have to witness their hands doing the work of another. But even if they are not, believe me when I say living as a slave to the hatred of someone else is a fate worse than death.

If we cannot save them, we owe it to them to bring them to rest.

( it's a negative perspective, and he knows it. but if he were in their place, and he has been in their place... he knows what he would want. )

Comments

[dishearten]

It's hard to say if a blow to the brain kills the Taxara or simply corrupts the brain to the point it can't be manipulated any longer. I'd be cautious all the same.

( as for the rest of it... Graham tilts his head in slight disbelief. it seems odd to him a stranger might accuse him of not understanding what he experienced, while ... clearly demonstrating he had no idea what he was talking about, either. )

Believe what you will. My point is finding some end to the Deemer should we lack a way to save them.

[slushfund]

(that was his attempt to be supportive, not flexing knowledge he doesn't have, but hiruma is more than alright with it being misinterpreted. the less people know about his gooey centre, the better...........)

Good point. (conceding with a pat to his colt m4 carbine, relying on it until he can get some ammunition from the weapon supplier here in perdition's rest.) It says here that "the host's original personality is wiped away completely, permanently." If that's the case, they're already fucking dead.

(the loss of personality, lifestyle, ideology, goals... as well as the status you held in life, losing your friends, your family — that sounds worse than death.)

[dishearten]

It sounds grim, that's for certain. I can't imagine recovering from that kind of damage, even if the brain itself can be healed.

( there's those on the team with the sort of magic that could mend that sort of injury, but Graham isn't sure anything can restore memories and personality once they're lost. )

The contact from ALASTAIR insinuated there might be a way, but he didn't seem to explain much of how.

[slushfund]

Well, they haven't given us anything in the way of information regarding this whole mysterious mishap that happened with them all those years ago, so.

(pessimistically,) I highly doubt they're going to tell us how to recover a lost personality. If they've got permanent amnesia from these things, isn't it just a mercy kill?

Think of what'll happen if they ever come to, just to discover they don't know who or what or where they are?

[dishearten]

I'd think this sort of damage would leave them more than vacant of personal memories. They'd likely forget how to speak, social rules they needed to learn as children. That sort of thing can't be rebuilt properly.

( it wouldn't be much of a life, he thinks. all the same... )

ALASTAIR is capable of much, though surely they have their limits as well. These taxara are likely of more interest to them than the Deemer themselves.

[slushfund]

Touché. Imagine relearning basic motor functions.

(lol, no thanks. he would, if he could retain his own personality, but forgetting his entire life and starting completely anew with no personal agenda? talk about his worst nightmare. literally anything, including murder, would be far easier.)

Without a doubt, though. Someone's made a few enemies. I think they might be trying to fuck with the timeline to get some kinda skewed revenge on ALASTAIR, but that's just one explanation of many.

[dishearten]

We're not like to get a whole story, if any attempts at talking to Deemers are any indication.

( the Taxara were closemouthed, insanely so; ALASTAIR slightly less, but not by much. )

In the end we might not have a clear answer to how to help these people. If anything I hope my perspective offers some kind of insight. ( that however difficult, killing them might be more merciful than 'saving' them. )

[slushfund]

I don't know what they expect to get outta interrogating one of 'em after yanking 'em from the hosts' ears. Gross.

(a flip of a hand, examining the blunts of his nails.)

I can't relate, but what you're saying makes sense — at the very least. Slavery's not on the fuckin' agenda.

[dishearten]

Hard to imagine they'd even be communicable at that point.

( they needed a host to survive and exist, after all; could they speak and interact without some sort of being to exist in? perhaps to each other, but Audentes didn't have a Taxara on the team. )

On that, we agree. If we can't save them, we can at least release them. Though I know it's not much of a release.

[slushfund]

Good, at least we'll know to pop each other if one of us get infected. Here's my permission.

(a pause, contemplating.)

And thanks for the pro-tips.

(with that said, hiruma cuts the connection.)