text; un: shitpost king

[hedonistic]

if anyone can tell me how to get videogames or proper internet on this thing i will do a dare of ur choice and let u record the results for posterity/blackmail/whatever u want

in the meantime i've got way too much time to kill so let's play would you rather

for those of you poor souls who've never known the glory of the internet, it goes like this: someone posts two things (the more ridic the better) and people respond with their decision on which they'd rather do and then come up with their own two things

it ends up with us all judging each other's life and choices and nobody lives happily ever after (◡‿◡✿)

i'll start with something appropriate to our upcoming ~mission~

would you rather...
be eaten by a zombie, or burnt at the stake?

Comments

[heavyhitter]

wow already got that high an opinion of me, i'm touched
guess you never been to italy huh

1/2

[hedonistic]

i mean u did start this thing off with being tied naked to a pole
kind of conjures up a certain set of expectations
not that i'm complaining ☆⌒(ゝ。∂)

dw what the fuck are you doing i'm so sorry i hope you're not getting multiple notifs

[hedonistic]

and nah
nobody's been allowed in or out of the japan i'm from in like twenty fucking years

i got all 108 of them

[heavyhitter]

a lot of good things start that way

what the fuck happened over in japan
what year are you from

ah, it missed one

[hedonistic]

can't argue with that tbh

and the sybil system happened
there wasn't any room left in the ~perfect society~ it was making for foreigners
it's 2112 for me

[heavyhitter]

hahaha now there's a system that works i can just tell
anyway that sure didn't happen in my 2112, i'm sure i woulda heard about that one

[hedonistic]

i mean
there's like wars and shit outside
so like
it works enough that most people don't give a shit about who it doesn't work for

[Kagari? Bitter? Perish the thought.]

good to know that literally every japan sucks less than mine tho

[So far, anyway. But there's been at least three, by now. There's definitely been a pattern of decreased suckitude among other Japans.]

[heavyhitter]

yeah looks like you won the lottery, grats
anyway good news: you never have to go back if you don't wanna

[hedonistic]

yeah i get to be a dog for either the shitty government i know or the shady organization i don't
i'll bust out the confetti

[heavyhitter]

relax, the worst these guys do is send you somewhere chilly

[hedonistic]

if that's what helps u sleep at night dude

[Kagari has...no faith in ALASTAIR whatsoever. He fully expects to be used and exploited the way the MWPSB did to him, and the fact that the whole Audentes team is made up of dimensional refugees that had no other option (aside from being stuck inside Oska forever, presumably) doesn't help on that score.]

[heavyhitter]

hahaha what do you think they're gonna do

[hedonistic]

that's the problem, idk
i mean don't get me wrong here, i don't care if they're using me, i expect that much
it's the part where they act all benevolent about it i'm not buying

[heavyhitter]

idk if anyone explained this but there's not really a "they" to be using you
the whole organization is the hectic scatter of weirdos and we're all on our own
it's kinda nice

[hedonistic]

there's no such thing as an organization without *someone* in charge
if it's not lloyd it's someone
maybe he doesn't know who, maybe he doesn't want us to know
but us dimensional refugees aren't the ones holding the cards around here, i'm sure of that much

[heavyhitter]

hahaha omg
go tell lloyd you think he's in charge
BUT WAIT i wanna be there when you do it

[hedonistic]

look i'm just saying
there's SOMEONE that's responsible for the timeline machine and managing the portal shit to take us places and the magic that runs the jewelry and the kitchen etc
whoever that is pretty much owns us

[heavyhitter]

sure, lemme know when you find them
i'm gonna be getting my nails done in the next world before the zombies close down all the salons

[hedonistic]

hey i never said i was looking
just that i'm not All In for jumping ship from *my* shithole
the devil u kno, and all that

anyway who says u oughta stop there
respecting a closed sign is for squares, obviously you gotta loot one for all its nail related paraphernalia like any respectable zombie apocalypse survivor, come on

[heavyhitter]

oh my god it's like you've never been to a salon
you don't go for the product you go for getting your nails did
that means the workers can't be zombies yet, get it

[hedonistic]

[That's objectively true, he hasn't, but also--]

but once they close down due to zombie paranoia there's no reason to have ur nails looking less than fabulous right

[heavyhitter]

is this you offering to do them for me
because i accept, thanks

[hedonistic]

more like enabling petty thievery but sure lol
if u don't mind ur fingers becoming a different genre of horror movie, anyway

[...bullshit tbh, he'd probably be good at it.]

[heavyhitter]

i want black but red will do in a pinch
make sure you do some undercoat before and after, i lived the sharpie scribble nail polish life and i'm done with low grade shit

[hedonistic]

y not both

[k a g a r i no.]

undercoat is the clear shit right