super cali swagilistic sexy hella dopeness (
competing) wrote in
futurology2017-01-22 04:25 pm
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Entry tags:
- achilles (iliad),
- anakin skywalker (star wars),
- arima kishou (tokyo ghoul: re),
- asher millstone (htgawm),
- chihiro ogino (spirited away),
- jin kung (mortal kombat),
- kaz brekker (grishaverse),
- keith (voltron),
- knock out (transformers prime),
- koltira deathweaver (world of warcraft),
- lance (voltron),
- mettaton (undertale),
- oliver hampton (htgawm),
- peter parker (the amazing spider-man),
- sonia nevermind (danganronpa 2),
- takashi shirogane (voltron),
- vaughn (borderlands),
- widowmaker (overwatch)
video | username: xXx_trueblue_xXx
[ with the new mission on the horizon, and a rather desperate need to keep busy and distracted, lance has decided to put together this informational psa for all those who may benefit from it.
so. like. maybe two of you. ]
Yo! So with Woodhurst coming 'round the corner, many of you probably haven't had the chance to brush up on all six films of the Brawn of the Dead series but that's okay! Your resident Zombie Apocalypse Expert is here to help you out.
[ he's watched pretty much all the zombie films available on earth, ok, he's practically a PhD. ]
While it's pretty much impossible to gain my level of expertise in the single week we have left, I managed to break down the most important things to remember during a Zombie Apocalypse. [ complete with handy, dandy infographics! (blame whoever got them the drawing app ok.) ]
Lesson one! The buddy system.

ALASTAIR's got it right with their advice. Anyone who's ever seen a movie about characters being hunted by something can tell you right off the bat that the second you decide to go solo? YA DEAD. Total rookie mistake! Don't do it, don't even think about it, don't even think about thinking about it. Doesn't matter how slow the zombies are, or how many of them there are. Always have a buddy with you. And honestly? You're not gonna wanna go through any of this alone anyway.
If no one's coming to mind, just give me a call. My name's Lance, and I'm gonna be a college student there, and those guys never need reasons to be anyplace weird anyway.
Lesson two! Weapons.

Standard zombie movie weapons tend to be something light, hand-held, easy to hook onto your belt or carry around in a bag. Guns are okay, but unless you have unlimited ammo, it's a better idea to also have something that doesn't need replenishing. But remember we're also trying to blend in here, so busting our your swords and magic might not be what you wanna do... but also who cares when it's just you, an empty alleyway, and the not-so-dead. Tire irons are a classic, also kitchen knives, but it's important to remember: anything's a weapon if you can throw it hard enough.
And finally, lesson three — [ there isn't an infographic for this one. this time it's just lance, staring straight into the camera, the mood of the video suddenly quite serious and somber. ] — this is all real.
[ he shifts a little, uneasy. ]
I know the mission's primary objective is to contain this thing, keep it from spreading. And we should definitely do all we can to make sure it affects as few people as possible... but these are real people, you know? Real people, with real lives... real families. None of our objectives are for finding a cure, but man do we have some real smart people on this team. Real smart. And, like, magic, you know? Magic and science and all that stuff, from all over the universes. If you have that many people, from all these different backgrounds, with all these different skills then it has to be possible, right? That's just... that's math. So with magic and science and math on our sides, there's no way we can fail.
[ he got away from his point a little, so he backtracks into it. ]
What I'm saying is — be careful. Do what you gotta do, but if there's a way for you to save them so we can one day cure them, then... do that too. [ the please goes unspoken, but the sentiment is definitely there.
after a moment, he seems to bolster himself back up to the energy he'd had when he began. ]
And that's it! Questions? Thoughts? Apples for the teacher? [ ;D ]
so. like. maybe two of you. ]
Yo! So with Woodhurst coming 'round the corner, many of you probably haven't had the chance to brush up on all six films of the Brawn of the Dead series but that's okay! Your resident Zombie Apocalypse Expert is here to help you out.
[ he's watched pretty much all the zombie films available on earth, ok, he's practically a PhD. ]
While it's pretty much impossible to gain my level of expertise in the single week we have left, I managed to break down the most important things to remember during a Zombie Apocalypse. [ complete with handy, dandy infographics! (blame whoever got them the drawing app ok.) ]
Lesson one! The buddy system.

ALASTAIR's got it right with their advice. Anyone who's ever seen a movie about characters being hunted by something can tell you right off the bat that the second you decide to go solo? YA DEAD. Total rookie mistake! Don't do it, don't even think about it, don't even think about thinking about it. Doesn't matter how slow the zombies are, or how many of them there are. Always have a buddy with you. And honestly? You're not gonna wanna go through any of this alone anyway.
If no one's coming to mind, just give me a call. My name's Lance, and I'm gonna be a college student there, and those guys never need reasons to be anyplace weird anyway.
Lesson two! Weapons.

Standard zombie movie weapons tend to be something light, hand-held, easy to hook onto your belt or carry around in a bag. Guns are okay, but unless you have unlimited ammo, it's a better idea to also have something that doesn't need replenishing. But remember we're also trying to blend in here, so busting our your swords and magic might not be what you wanna do... but also who cares when it's just you, an empty alleyway, and the not-so-dead. Tire irons are a classic, also kitchen knives, but it's important to remember: anything's a weapon if you can throw it hard enough.
And finally, lesson three — [ there isn't an infographic for this one. this time it's just lance, staring straight into the camera, the mood of the video suddenly quite serious and somber. ] — this is all real.
[ he shifts a little, uneasy. ]
I know the mission's primary objective is to contain this thing, keep it from spreading. And we should definitely do all we can to make sure it affects as few people as possible... but these are real people, you know? Real people, with real lives... real families. None of our objectives are for finding a cure, but man do we have some real smart people on this team. Real smart. And, like, magic, you know? Magic and science and all that stuff, from all over the universes. If you have that many people, from all these different backgrounds, with all these different skills then it has to be possible, right? That's just... that's math. So with magic and science and math on our sides, there's no way we can fail.
[ he got away from his point a little, so he backtracks into it. ]
What I'm saying is — be careful. Do what you gotta do, but if there's a way for you to save them so we can one day cure them, then... do that too. [ the please goes unspoken, but the sentiment is definitely there.
after a moment, he seems to bolster himself back up to the energy he'd had when he began. ]
And that's it! Questions? Thoughts? Apples for the teacher? [ ;D ]
no subject
[Asher may not have the mind for any of the legal tap-dancing, not yet, but at least they've got Hiruma's.]
They're pretty hands off.
[He'll get to that offer in a minute. At the very least, he appreciates Lance's mutual desire to make this a team effort.]
no subject
They're probably busy with their own missions.
no subject
You trust them, don't you?
[He's not typically very cynical, and so the tone of his question doesn't sound that way. There's just a hint of disbelief within it, that and pity.]
no subject
[ lance's own disbelief, in turn, stems more from curiosity than pity. as if the idea had never even occurred to him. ]
no subject
It never occurred to you that we could have been kidnapped?
no subject
this whole thing with alastair seems pretty par for the course, at this point. ]
If these people wanted to kidnap us to do their work, I'm pretty sure they could have picked a better group of people to do it.
[ no offense, but they kind of really suck at this. ]
no subject
After all, if they were to pull people from his world... Why not pick literally any of the others? Michaela Pratt is one of the smartest human beings who's ever walked the Earth, Connor Walsh seems to possess enough confidence to worm his way out of anything, and Laurel and Wes, well!
They're resourceful, to say the least.]
I know, but...
[Asher stops himself from going further. There's no use in arguing with a teenager about this. He rubs the back of his neck with an air of hesitation.]
Nevermind, um. We're getting off track here, sorry. That's my fault.
What I mean to say is that protecting ourselves is definitely important, because I'm not sure if ALASTAIR's really got our backs on this one. But we should be careful, because there are laws in this world.
There's a police force that I think we've got a few of our folks on, but... If they make a target of one of our own? We're screwed. So...
It's gonna be just as important to stay out of the limelight, basically.
no subject
It doesn't make sense to expect other teams to have our backs if they're busy with their own missions. [ it'd definitely be nice to think alastair can afford extra manpower to help them... but if he's understanding what he heard correctly, the rest of alastair is essentially just made up of people just like them — unfortunate enough to walk through a rift, or with nothing left in their lives but to volunteer. ]
We all need to come together and make sure we're on the same page with this. Back in Perdition's Rest, everyone was off doing whatever the heck they wanted, which just wound up making things worse for us in the long run. I heard some of us even got landed in jail! I know, technically, we accomplished our mission there but... I don't know anyone who'd look back on that and consider it a job well done. It could've been better. We should've been better.
no subject
It should, but the voice in the back of his mind continues to whisper. His foundation has been shaken to the core as of recent, and if he couldn't even trust his own father to be the person Asher thought he was...
How on Earth is he going to trust an organization that shouldn't, by his logical standards, even be real in the first place?]
God, I hear ya.
[Asher folds his arms over his chest, face contorting into an expression that looks almost painful. He is doing his best to put that horrible image out of his mind despite the way it rears its ugly head again, but it's not quite as clear as it was a week before.
Progress.]
A part of me wonders if we did more harm than good. Like, I know we got those guys out of there, but! There were so many other things that went wrong...
I'm not tryin' to drag ya for doin' your best, homie. I'm just saying that we should be a little more careful than we've been before. This situation, it's tricky.
no subject
Frankly, I think it's good we're all talking about this now. It'll be nice going into this if we're all sort of on the same page.
no subject
I don't know if that's gonna happen.
[Not with how different everybody is.]
But at the very least, we can help each other out.
no subject
[ now if only everyone felt that way. ]
no subject
Lance gives off the vibe of a real team player, and on that, they are one and the same.]
Tell ya what.
[Another sigh.]
I know these missions can get kinda... Whack. Yeah?
[A bubble of a laugh.]
Sometimes it helps to talk to different people about it. Sure! It's probably better to just go right to your best friends with that sorta stuff, but...
If you need another opinion, or just need to someone to listen to you vent, you can drop me a line.
That sound like something you'd be into?
no subject
Yeah. Yeah, man, thanks.
[ he... marvels at how it feels, actually. to have that offer extended to him for a change. ]
I'm Lance, by the way.
no subject
Right.
[They've spoken before.
He nods into the camera, gesturing to himself with one hand.]
I'm Asher.
[This conversation has been fairly candid, surprisingly.]
It's nice to meet you, dude.
Here's hopin' things don't turn out for the worst.