text; un: shitpost king

[hedonistic]

if anyone can tell me how to get videogames or proper internet on this thing i will do a dare of ur choice and let u record the results for posterity/blackmail/whatever u want

in the meantime i've got way too much time to kill so let's play would you rather

for those of you poor souls who've never known the glory of the internet, it goes like this: someone posts two things (the more ridic the better) and people respond with their decision on which they'd rather do and then come up with their own two things

it ends up with us all judging each other's life and choices and nobody lives happily ever after (◡‿◡✿)

i'll start with something appropriate to our upcoming ~mission~

would you rather...
be eaten by a zombie, or burnt at the stake?

Comments

[hedonistic]

Ssssssoooo. A new species just--popped up out of nowhere and decided to murder everything.

...Not gonna lie, your world sounds like some kind of shitty horror b-movie.

[p66]

[ She makes a sort of shrug as a gesture. ]

We're still fighting back. It's not hopeless.

[ Julius had been the source of not one but two apocalypses but they managed to stop that, so it's not impossible. ]

[hedonistic]

I mean, I figured, sorta....just, how does that kind of thing even happen?

[The Sybil System is the result of people trying to create a perfect society. It's deeply flawed and occasionally horrifying, but its existence was never out of people's hands.]

[p66]

We don't know.

[ Well, Sakaki had a hypothesis, but. ]

We'll just have to do our best to deal with the aftermath.

[hedonistic]

It sounds like a huge mess.

[He's a bit out of his depth tbh. And he's a bit torn, emotionally. Would he be happier, fighting an ongoing post-apocalyptic battle when the apocalypse was nobody's fault? Is it better to have an attachment to that kind of world, or to live the kind of life he's had, which has been miserable and painful but at least he always knew that it was a society in which he had nothing to lose, in which his job was only a means to avoid suffering rather than in any real belief in what he was doing.

He doesn't let that train of thought go far before he shuts it down. It's better not to go into 'should have's and 'might have been's, he'll only drive himself crazy. Or crazier, maybe.]

Right. So uh, you wanna do something? Like, watch a movie or play the DDR app or read a manga?

[p66]

[ It is a huge mess, and it's clearly not a comfortable subject for the both of them, so she just leaves it at that. ]

I'd love to. Do you mind if I take some of the food you've made, though? I need to make dinner for Julius.

[ So if she gives him what Kagari's made she would be free to hang out, so to speak. ]

[hedonistic]

[Oh, Reika. You perhaps shouldn't have told him that. He has a terrible shit-eating grin on his face now.]

Sure. Leftovers aren't very romantic, though. We should make something fresh.

[p66]

[ Oh shit!! ]

We're just friends.

[ And she says it so convincingly, too. She's good at keeping her own feelings hidden. ]

Ah, I shouldn't trouble you with that... but okay.

[hedonistic]

Do you make dinner for all your "friends"?

[Yes, there were air quotes.]

[p66]

[ She'll protest her innocence (?) until the very end!!! ]

Well, if they can't cook for themselves and need to eat more, then yes.

[ Look she's also The Mom friend you can't expect her to not ]

[hedonistic]

It's a magic kitchen, Reika-chan. It'll cook for you if you want it to.

[And then he slyly...raises his eyebrows...Knowingly]

If you ask me, though, food tastes better when you make it yourself. Especially if you've got someone in mind to eat it~

[p66]

It's a magic kitchen alright, but I don't know what goes into the food. I can't trust the nutritional value unless I cook it myself.

[ Julius looked positively deathly when she first saw him. That has to change. ]

He doesn't take good care of himself so I have to remind him. [ Or do it in his place, as it were. ]

[hedonistic]

Riiight. As friends do, of course~

[Just guys and gals being pals. He understands, Reika-chan ♥]

[p66]

[ Seriously, men. That includes you too, Kagari. ]

Will you help me?

[ Since they're going to hang later she might as well start work now. ]

[hedonistic]

...Sure, yeah.

[Why the hell not. He literally has nothing better to do, anyway.]

What's he like to eat?

[Clearly a homemade meal of Julius' favorite food will get this ship train to leave the station faster, right]

[p66]

[ She's already making it for him daily and it doesn't seem to have much effect, so - good luck. ]

Pasta, but I've been doing that for the past few days so maybe some variation would be nice.

[ He doesn't complain though. That's just how he is. ]

[hedonistic]

I'm gonna need some more detail than just "noodles", Reika-chan. What kind of noodles are we talking here, and what flavors does he like in his sauce? Does he like it with vegetables? Meat? Would he prefer it in a soup?

[Gently interrogates about ur bf's food preferences uwu]

[p66]

[ s m h ]

He's not picky, so he doesn't have any concrete preferences. He takes anything I give him.

[ She's asked him and he said 'anything as long as it's healthy', so ??? ]

[hedonistic]

[Eyebrows...slowly....going up.]

Ohhhh my god.

[That doesn't sound unhealthily codependent or anything.]

[p66]

[ Man, if only you knew what they get up to in private... okay this sounds shady but it's a just shitload of h/c stuff. She's pure. ]

He's a stickler for nutritional balance, so I have to factor that in, but that's about it.

[ She thinks it's 100% normal. ]

[hedonistic]

So, uh. He just expects you to do this for him. Every meal.

[p66]

[ Actually, now that he mentions it... ]

I wouldn't say expect? [ This sounds awkward ] It's more of a courtesy sort of thing. Diet is important after all.

[ 'courtesy' ]

[hedonistic]

[Look he knows he ain't great at manners and he's the last person to judge anyone else but....gurl...]

Sure. But if it's gonna be 'you do it or he doesn't eat' it starts sounding less like a thing you're doing for a friend because you're friends and more like a job you're not getting paid for.

[p66]

[ Man, how does she even begin to explain this? ]

He'll eat if I don't do anything, he's not that incapable of taking care of himself. It's just that I'm not all that confident of the magic stuff here, if you get me?

[ Once she ended up dancing in the kitchen and that was weird. ]

His health is subpar and I don't want him to get poisoned or worse.

[ Yep nothing shady here. ]

[hedonistic]

[He debates, for a minute, whether he even wants to get involved. Reika's life is none of his business. If she's happy with playing nursemaid to this guy, that's not his problem.

Maybe it's the giant chip on his shoulder about being used, but he can't help feeling kind of weird about it, though.]

'You do it or he might accidentally poison himself' isn't exactly sounding better, Reika-chan.

[He shifts, uncomfortably.]

Look, I'm the last person who's gonna tell anyone else how to live their life, but this guy's a grown ass man, right? It's not your responsibility to hold his hand. The least he could do is try to give you some fuckin' preferences so you're not the one trying to figure out how to give him variety, dude.