futurology | Video | Username: tigermillionaire [Dated around the beginning of the month]

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Video | Username: tigermillionaire [Dated around the beginning of the month]

[Steven broadcasts a video from the inn room where he is. He looks like he's in good spirits and has several items laid out on the table.]

Hey everyone! It's me, Steven Quartz Universe. I got some neat things from ALISTAIR lately! I got my phone, my Cheeseburger Backpack... [He indicates a smartphone and... well, a Cheeseburger Backpack.]

Aaand we got a special surpise, too! {He takes out a container of food.] If you guessed that it's a sad meal, you're way wrong. Itttt's a happy meal! And I haven't done an unboxing video since I left home, so I think it's time I did one here for all of you here in Chantes! Okay, let's see what we got.

[He reaches into the bag and pulls out some french fries.]

First, we got some french fries. Nice, nice - they're a cornerstone of any happy meal! It just wouldn't be the same without them. [He nibbles on one.] And it's good! Well, it's kind of greasy, but in the tasty way! And it has just the right amount of salt. This is what you want in french fries, people!

[He reaches back in and pulls out a cheeseburger.]

A cheeseburger! Nice. This is like the main event of a happy meal. It's cheesy, it's a burger. Where could you go wrong? It was a nice touch it make it a cheeseburger, too, so it matches my backpack! To think it's been so long since I've had one... I don't think that it has long in this world! [He giggles as he sets it down.] That's the main event of the happy meal. Except there's something even main-er! Let's see if I got one...

[He reaches in and pulls out a toy wrapped up in plastic wrap.]

Yesss!! It comes with a toy! And even better, it's of Dogcopter! That's so great! [He hugs the toy close to him and then settles down.]

Well, that does it for my first unboxing video as part of ALISTAIR. This happy meal gets... a 4 out of 5 stars, I think! Thanks for watching, and... let's keep doing our best for this mission, alright? [He gives a cheesy smile and a thumbs up before he cuts out the video.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He was drunk and barely paying attention, but Steven's enthusiasm wasn't lost on Ban whatsoever.

He didn't have much input, admittedly. The toy looked cool and the friends looked interesting, but he didn't really know what to expect of it all.

He'd probably ask about the ingredients, later.]

Why's the box got a mouth? That's a mouth, riiight ♪?

Hi Ban! Yeah, that's supposed to be a mouth. Or a drawing of one!

Because it's a happy meal, so the box is smiling. Get it?

[Then, the sort of question a hungry drunk would ask--]

Can you eat the box?

It looks like candy.

[The flat surface was bright--really bright. Things that red were usually either exceptionally well-tanned leather, but he could see the box wasn't particularly thick. It was almost like paper--not that Ban knew what in the world cardboard was.]